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Cobra Kai was badass...

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#1 Samuel L. Jackson

Samuel L. Jackson


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Posted 05 November 2009 - 10:36 AM

Just found this FB group and laughed pretty hard while reading some of the comments and stuff... Yeah, I am bored this morning...


Organizations - Religious Organizations

Think about it:

They were a bunch of preppy blonde white kids with dirt bikes.

They were totally dedicated to going to their dojo every day to learn how to kick innocent people's asses and assert their social/economic dominance of the community via karate.

Their motto was "Strike First, Strike Hard, Show No Mercy," of which all three elements go against the usual karate stuff about avoiding conflict and being all swan-like and merciful.

Their best kid was named Johnny Lawrence and he fuged people up and called Mr. Miyagi a stupid old man.

Ralph Macchio came to one of their social functions and got food splattered all over his poor, new-kid ass.

The Cobra Kai didn't need a bunch of montages and internment camp anecdotes from an old Japanese guy to motivate them to beat ass.

Their sensei's cinematic characterization consisted entirely of a two-second shot of a picture of him holding a grenade launcher in Vietnam and looking like he needed to take a huge dump all over your village.

Said sensei told his students to go after Ralph Macchio, a la "Sweep the leg, Randy!"

They wore black karate gis with cobras on the back, and I don't even think Asia HAS snakes. God damn!

They almost won the All-Valley Tournament except for that mantis-kick, wax-on bullshit. All Valley is the realm of the fuging champs.

Pat Morita just died.

They rolled up on Ralph Macchio on their dirtbikes when he was at the beach trying to diddle Johnny Lawrence's ex girl. Then they popped his soccer ball and ran him over or some poo. Also they drove down in formation.

SWEEP THE LEG...Jesus, these are some badass motherfugers.

This group is dedicated to the real "best around"

#2 PanthaSan


    Sith Bewbie Padawan....

  • Joined: 25-November 08
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Posted 05 November 2009 - 01:20 PM

That's it, I gotta join...