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Iceberg Slim

Top Five Things You Hate To Hear Your Wife/gf Say.....

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My parents are coming into town.

Did you over serve yourself again? (usually joking)

I had a really bad day at work..........

Why do we hang out with your friends more than mine?

I wonder if the whole point of living is to procreate.....

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My parents are coming into town.

Forgot to add that one to my list.....pie for you sir

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"We need a break, by the way I'm taking the flatscreen." I wanted to murder that bitch...

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1. We need to talk

2. When are you going to fix (fill in blanks)

3. We need more quality time together

4. I have an idea, what about.______________________

5. I missed my period

Your turn

I have heard those so many times in my life, I'm numb to them.

My ex-fiancee kept playing the "Suicide Card" on me.

"If you force me to move out, I'll kill myself! then my death will be on your hands!"

I had heard this so much, that I finally said, "Fine, I'll give you your gun back."

(I had taken her .357 out of her car the first few times she threw that in my face. I had hidden it so well, I forgot for a while where I put it.)

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"We need a break, by the way I'm taking the flatscreen." I wanted to murder that bitch...

lol

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I have not... but I KNOW she really, really wants me

She actually asked me to tell you to stop staking her. Or at least that is what I thought she said. Her mouth was kind of full, so it was hard to understand her.

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I didn't know there was a Jennifer Aniston sex toy. I'm going to get one!

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"The car just started making that noise..."

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"The car just started making that noise..."

Yep....and the next sound is that damn sucking sound. Not the good one that your wife makes, but the one of cash sucking out of your wallet.

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Can I use your credit card?

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