My un-informed pre-camp power rankings
Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:26 PM
A. Preseason rankings. Periodically mention that things will change
B. Preseason Inebriation: Parts of this compilation may have taken place whilst author was partaking. Please disregard typos, iphone carry-on words/sentences and general incoherent thoughts.
31( - Jacksonville: Gabbert was bad last year but there are so many other pieces missing
31(A) - Indianapolis: Get the nod for not being rock bottom because of Luck. This team will rise at the end of the season.
30 - St. Louis: Like many people on this board have predicted, Michael Brokers will be a stud NFL DT... But it will take a couple years. Feel sorry for Sam.
29. Miami: For all the Matt Moore fans, please tune in to the farewell tour.
28. Minnesota: I like Christian Ponder in the future but the Golden Boy of the franchise just got arrested. The team is clearly stumbling. I think the veteran leadership on the team should step up. Maybe they should go to one of those lakes, charter a boat and... Uh, ok, skip that...
27. Cleveland: The Schwartz will be with Brandon Wheedon and he will win the starting job in camp
26. Tampa Bay: Lots of good addition. Will be a playoff spoiler at the end of the season but its gonna take some time.
25. Seattle: I think these guys are the definition of mediocre. Will have early struggles and then get better
24. Kansas City: There is always a puncher's chance.
23. Washington; If only Dan Snider would put up money for a new owner
22. Arizona: Patrick Peterson is the only real bright. With the Kevin Kolb trade, Andy Reid doesn't win the Super Bowl this year he is a leading candidate for GM.
21. Oakland: If Jamarcus Russel can get his weight under control the sky is the limit
20. Carolina: Lots of defensive concerns. At least 3 DL starters are not with the team yet. The kid from Coastal Carolina is scheduled for a rhinoplasty in early August.
19. Chargers: Rivers still has some gas left in the tank but the rest of the team has moved on (mostly via Carolina)
18. Atlanta: Team has no identity and seem to be stuck. Ryan and Smith need to step up.
17. Tennessee; Good team with expectations. Need someone to step up.
16. Jets: Lots of media but they are not that great. The Golden Calf of Bristol will add to mystique.
15. Detroit: Too many arrests. Dispite Madden cover, Megatron delivers this year.
14. Dallas: Can't fault Jerry for trying but these guys have a lot to prove
13. Cincinnati; They drop by default. Sophomore Slump, meet Andy Dalton. Andy Dalton, meet Sophomore Slump.
12. Chicago; Cutler has a lot to prove this year
11. New Orleans; The ranking will move down further but they have a lot of internal issues
10. Denver: "Hey John, What is a 3rd down draw play". Ask Peyton about pains in the neck after a few weeks with Foxy.
9. Buffalo: It took a while last year for this team to realize Thurman Thomas and Jim Kelly were not there. It will take a lot longer this year.
8. Baltimore: When I was 18 -20 I was cautioned to never get in a fight with an old man. Players should take notice. Ray Lewis and Ed Reed are very bad agents. In a different lifetime these guys would have played for the Raiders.
7. San Francisco: Great team. The equipment guy that gives Alex Smith the mouthpiece to bite on is the August MVP.
6. Pittsburgh; Perrenial playoff team is always dangerous. They are a working man's NE Patriots. Could easily win the SB.
5. New York(G): tom Coughlin hands out indestructible metal lunch boxes at the beginning of the season and tells everyone to go to work. Lack of a running game did not hurt these guys last year but may hamper them moving forward.
4. Green Bay; Brett who?
3. Philadelphia: See Arizona (#22) for Andy Reid golden parachute. This team is SB favorite baring injury.
2. Houston: These guys might just be the class of the league.
1. New England; Typical August. I think Tom Brady was swag before swag was a word.
Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:31 PM
Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:38 PM
Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:42 PM
Jamarcus has been out of the league for a while now...
Editorial comment on the state of the Raiders. Exaggeration for clarity.
The rankings look good, the comment; well... are you drunk?
I don't drink to get drunk. I just like the way it makes me feel.
Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:47 PM
Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:07 PM
Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:15 PM
And Tom Brady has class, not swag. He is a grown man.
Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:23 PM
Posted 11 July 2012 - 12:04 AM
Posted 11 July 2012 - 01:55 AM
.....did....you.....feel....that, that was neg rep being dumped on your face bukake style
Posted 11 July 2012 - 02:07 AM
Posted 11 July 2012 - 07:19 AM
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