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I cheated on my fiancé


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#1 N1kkadeemuz

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:19 AM

Don't know why, I was drunk so was the girl (a mutual friend). She told my fiancé Saturday night.

Now I'm not trying to make anyone feel sorry for me but I feel like the biggest POS ever. She has been practically perfect, she deserves someone so much better than me.

She wants to work it out but I don't. Every time we talk I feel so stupid, a complete asshole. I can't forgive myself and truly do not want to stay together. I forsee a lifetime of guilt, resentment, an distrust. I don't know how to articulate it without being even more of an asshole, like there's really any way to not be one.

So huddle if you've cheated or been cheated on what should I do?

#2 Darth Biscuit

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:22 AM

Dude, if she wants to work it out, you'd be a fool not to try.

If it was truly a drunken mistake, forgive yourself, try and make it up to her and stay away from the "mutual friend".

Don't do something else you'll regret just because you can't get past it yourself.

#3 Jase

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:26 AM

Probably irreparable harm done. Sometimes it ends up working out, but not usually.

#4 Niner National

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:26 AM

Don't know why, I was drunk so was the girl (a mutual friend). She told my fiancé Saturday night.

Now I'm not trying to make anyone feel sorry for me but I feel like the biggest POS ever. She has been practically perfect, she deserves someone so much better than me.

She wants to work it out but I don't. Every time we talk I feel so stupid, a complete asshole. I can't forgive myself and truly do not want to stay together. I forsee a lifetime of guilt, resentment, an distrust. I don't know how to articulate it without being even more of an asshole, like there's really any way to not be one.

So huddle if you've cheated or been cheated on what should I do?

You should only cheat with women that don't know your fiance in the future. Also, use a fake name and don't give them your cell phone #.

#5 Niner National

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:27 AM

Dude, if she wants to work it out, you'd be a fool not to try.

If it was truly a drunken mistake, forgive yourself, try and make it up to her and stay away from the "mutual friend".

Don't do something else you'll regret just because you can't get past it yourself.

Even if she wants to work it out, she'll never really let it go. Every time he goes out without her, she'll be suspicious. It will lead to fights even if he is doing nothing wrong.

It will never be the same.

#6 Panthro

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:28 AM

Why were you that drunk around this other girl? Sounds like you were subconsciously looking for an out.

#7 N1kkadeemuz

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:31 AM

It was a house party and we ran into each other. As far as looking for a way out part of me thinks your right. In the aftermath I'm not ready to get married.

#8 Darth Biscuit

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:33 AM

Even if she wants to work it out, she'll never really let it go. Every time he goes out without her, she'll be suspicious. It will lead to fights even if he is doing nothing wrong.

It will never be the same.


Possibly very true... but if she says she wants to try... imo it would be stupid for him not to try.

But he's got to get over it himself before he can even get that far with her.


If it was straight up, they were talking and he hooked up with this chick, completely sober, then that's one thing... but like I said, if it was pure drunken horniness... there are things that can be done to remedy that in the future, and maybe his fiance sees that.

#9 Darth Biscuit

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:33 AM

It was a house party and we ran into each other. As far as looking for a way out part of me thinks your right. In the aftermath I'm not ready to get married.


You're not ready to get married in general, or you're not ready to get married b/c of this situation?

#10 The Saltman

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:57 AM

Don't drink too much. People make mistakes and she is willing to work it out. You already made a stupid decision don't make another.

#11 The Saltman

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 11:59 AM

Now of you're not ready to get married you better figure that out quick. Trust me if you're not 100% sure you want to get married don't. It's better then getting married and then getting a divorce. Divorce sucks long cocks.

#12 g5jamz

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 12:00 PM

You have a fiance' and put yourself into a position of compromising her trust and blaming it on booze?

Until you feel you can be truthful with a bunch of random people on a forum on the internet...I wish I could speak directly to your fiance' to tell her to leave.

#13 Hawk

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 12:08 PM

end it....you screwed up big time for whatever reason....booze...uncertainty etc....if you can't commit to her during engagement, you surely won't be able to commit to her for life!

#14 4Corners

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 12:08 PM

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#15 Darth Biscuit

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Posted 24 September 2012 - 12:09 PM

You have a fiance' and put yourself into a position of compromising her trust and blaming it on booze?

Until you feel you can be truthful with a bunch of random people on a forum on the internet...I wish I could speak directly to your fiance' to tell her to leave.


I don't know what you read, but I'm pretty sure that's not what he did. He admitted to the situation and said he was drunk... not really blaming it on booze imo.


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