Posted 29 December 2012 - 01:05 AM
Here I am, fresh off a two day drive back to Charlotte from a Christmas vacation at my in-laws in northern Michigan. I drove a fuging minivan 18 hours up and 18 hours back so my wife and two kids could enjoy the holidays with her side of the family, do a little skiing, and chill the fug out for a few days. I gave up my tickets and found a bar in Cadillac, MI so I could watch my beloved Panthers play the Raiders with no fuging sound because of the Packers game. I helped an old lady install a TV in her room at a retirement home. I made up stories to sneak out of the house to avoid my bro-in-laws coffee so I could go buy some Tim Horton's coffee. So now I find myself drinking some late night beers to blow off some of the steam I built up driving through hell as I followed the 8 million people that have transplanted from up north to Charlotte; the extra traffic making my 8 hour leg of the trip nearly 10 hours. I'm pooping with a beer in my left hand and my iPhone in my right. All in all it has been a decent few days. Now, my Panthers get to face the Taints and bandwagon nation on Sunday. If there is a larger bandwagon fanbase in this universe I would like to see them. It's ironic how quite you "diehard" faggy little "lifelong" Saint fans have been this year. I guess that dream of holding the Lombardi up in front of Gordell at the rape dome collapsed like a paper mâché levee. And today your Vicodin addict coach agreed to sign an extension so I figured Alicejandra would be here jumping for joy and bragging about how rich his sugar daddy's make him. But I guess by now you idiots are rocking Cowboy or Seahawks gear. Seahawk J is in full effect on some Pacific Northwest message board spewing hate towards Ram fans I suppose. Well, I just wanted to say eat my poo Saints fans, assuming there are any around nowadays. A corn filled turd floats in a bowl of water. You guys sink like a ton of bricks when the going gets tough, just as I predicted. You guys are all a bunch of soft excuses for pussies. I hope Drew Brees's mole gets infected when Greg Hardy plants his sweaty nut sack on it after a sack. Rot in hell you filth from that sub-sea level shithole. And sleep well knowing that the only Super Bowl win in your crappy franchise history has a big fat asterisk by it. One final note, your 2012 Taints defense is 280 yards shy of becoming the worst in NFL history. Suck it.