Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Bronn

Is this normal? Early onset mid-life crisis? WTF?

40 posts in this topic

NO, NO and NO!

your wife and child doesn't need to pay for your need of change!

make small changes and find things of interest to get you out of the rut.

as someone else mentioned...acquire those things that you deem to be important one bit at a time....a total change isn't required.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't really want to acquire things... I want to get rid of them and simplify...

I'm not really a minimalist by definition, but I want to move away from letting the things I own actually owning me...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

<<I'd be doing it in the South Pacific. With machine guns and mortars for the pirates, naturally.

I was just referring to the near future to hone my skills. Once the last kid is grown I am off to the Keys, then off to some foreign land.....like Belize, Bali, or Lake Havasu AZ.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

thank god Canada didn't make that list

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 26 and I got the same feeling. You know what helps? Just going away somewhere for a week or 2, away from everything.

I actually find doing that to be more depressing because you see what life can be like when you're not doing your normal thing.

I prefer going on many little trips to get away at least twice a month.

I have 15 vacation days. I'd honestly rather take three day weekends 15 times a year (or maybe a couple 4 day weekends) than go on one long trip that uses up 10 days.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I heard of a guy who did that.

His name was Ted Kaczynski.

Exactly what I was thinking.

I know as I've gotten older I've gotten less materialistic. Not sure why that is, but I guess you get to a point in your life where you look at all the stuff you have, and wonder how it would be to live without all that stuff.

I doubt I'd ever go full Grizzly Adams, but I can see the allure of getting away from it all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

same poo here bronn, i've been down that road. i'm a bit younger than you (27 now) but the midlife crisis hit me at age 22. i grew up in a household of massively high expectations based entirely around financial success and social status. acquiring as much money as possible and attaining security and stability and status were the gods of my formative years. and so when my knees blew out and i got booted from the marines and dropped out of school and working in a goddamn fast food kitchen i dropped into a pretty deep existential crisis for a good long time. that's when i began to question the entire realm of ideology i'd been fed since childhood, and in an effort to escape it i basically did a brain dump and shoved aside all my preexisting notions about the world and what it meant to live and started over fresh. i spent probably a year straight in the guilford college library almost every night reading nothing but philosophy and theology and literature and science and geography and astronomy and everything else in an attempt to ingest as much knowledge as possible and to, at the same time, find my place in the universe, if i had one.

what happened was a gradual slide away from the grasp of materialism and the deadly clutches of western consumer culture. i began to see those things for the shadows they are rather than security they're propped up to be, and in the process of this paradigm shift i completely lost respect for death and for fear and for security and comfort, and in response i quit my job, sold the better part of my possessions, and bought a one-way ticket to australia. i wandered through australian wilderness and up into the jungles of southeast asia living out of an old external frame backpack and doing nothing but reading and writing and thinking and engaging in discourse with as many new people as i could encounter, seeking, in what was almost a spiritual experience - a pilgrimage of sorts, as i recognize it now to have been - the answers to life's greatest mysteries.

years later, in truth, i am no closer to arriving at those answers, and in fact the waters have been muddied quite considerably. the more i discover the more complex things become in my mind. but i am attempting to make a career out of pursuing those answers, and i have discovered a great many intangible things to find joy in this life, and now i'm married to someone who shares in the dream of creating a community property with the goal of bringing in orphans and foster care castoffs and caring for them, and enabling others on the property to accomplish great, world-changing goals by the support of the collective, financially and otherwise. it's that drive that keeps me working 60-70 hour workweeks along with full time school to make this a reality.

so... there comes a point when idealism meets reality, and of course you can't just up and fly to australia and leave your wife and kids behind. but maybe that longing in your heart can be fulfilled by finding an adventure, a deeper purpose, in life, one that goes beyond your mere existence. it's something to explore; maybe you'll like what you find.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You may ask yourself, what is that beautiful house?

You may ask yourself, where does that highway lead to?

You may ask yourself, am I right, am I wrong?

You may say to yourself, my god, what have I done?

Same as it ever was.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You can get away from those things now Bron, right where you are.

Funny thing is getting a smart TV helped me get away from "the suck" at little.

Instead of watching the "EVERYTHING IS BAD" network news in the evenings, I play music through Pandora (instrumental covers, and the like)

win

Went the 46" 240hz LED w/ Apple TV cloud mirroring this past year...no more cable tv, no more hdmi chords...fuggin rocks

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites



  • Posts

    • Mitchell would be a mistake IMO. He's too short to play with Walker. It would be the NBA's smallest backcourt. 
    • Look at this from Greg's viewpoint: 1. We did not draft or bring in a TE (many of us, including me, thought the team might bring in a young TE) Greg knows we have few options at this point. 2. Greg is about to retire (2-3 years) and his stock will never be higher.  He has led the team in receiving for a few years. 3. He knows there is cap room.  Gettlemen wants to carry  that over to re-sign 3 hog mollies for 2018; Olsen wants it now.) I think the Panthers lack of movement at TE has Olsen in a great negotiating position. Now let's take a look at the Panther's position: His quote about business and productivity could backfire on him. Businesses sign contracts for future services.  People sign them every day and honor them.  I may sign a long-term contract for less than I am worth, but in turn, I get security.  If you think you are worth more, don't sign.  I think the problem is the transparency over salaries.  If you know what Jacob Tamme made last year because his agent worked out a great deal, you can use that to negotiate a new deal for Olsen if you compare the numbers.  However, Tamme may have underperformed his deal, and it is erroneous to assume the performance of others based on their contracts is fair market value.  What they offer and what you take is fair market value. If Olsen wants a deal based on his productivity, remove his guaranteed money and make it incentive based. Take away the guarantees and make it possible for him to earn $10m--or $2m, depending on his productivity.  I am sure that he wants the security of the current deal and the Panthers to assume all risk.   Do you think the Raiders did not think that Jamarcus Russell's deal should equal productivity?  It is a gamble for both sides--a 4-5 year contract is security.  Guaranteed money you take for a promise to perform at your highest level for the length of the contract.  Olsen is not giving money back if he has a bad year, I assure you.  Contracts are not rewards, they only concern themselves with the now and the future. So where you ranked last year and the year before that---that simply means the Panthers made a wise investment in Greg Olsen.  I mean, if I invest in Cisco stock, buying it at $40 per share because it is expected to rise to $50 per share and it ends the year at $60, Cisco does not come to me and say, "We should have charged you more when you bought our shares--can we have an additional $8 per share?" THAT is business . Olsen should blame himself if he signed a lower deal than he is worth.  If he did not believe he was worth more then, why should the Panthers pay more now?  The Panthers paid him fair market value and he accepted the offer. I think it is bad practice to start paying people who outperform their contracts