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For the married folks: How do you all manage bank accounts?


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#16 Inimicus

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:21 AM

Joint everything. If I couldn't trust my wife to be completely responsible with all of our money then I would find a different spouse.

#17 Jase

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:23 AM

It takes every red cent we have every month to make ends meet, so separate bank accounts are a luxury of sorts.

We're joint on my wife's account. I have my own account, but only because it is a hassle to add her to it. She can see it any time she wants, in all of its empty glory.

#18 Zcustom

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:27 AM

Joint.

Not hard to keep track of it when there's not much of it. Reminds me of something funny I heard the other day. "There's too much month at the end of my money"

#19 Mrs Pantherfan

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:28 AM

Joint everything. If I couldn't trust my wife to be completely responsible with all of our money then I would find a different spouse.


In our situation its got nothing to do with trust why we don't have joint accounts. We were together for 4 years before we got married..what worked for us with bills, worked for us..so we didn't change it. We've now been together for almost 13 years and keeping it separate still works. I do better with money when it's on a debit card..he prefers cash. I know exactly what's being spent b/c I'm the only one swiping on the account. We honestly never really argue or fight..but when we do money is never one of those things.

#20 mr beauxjangles

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:40 AM

I'm glad this question was asked. The fiancee and I have been discussing this recently. We have a joint savings account already but are discussing what to do with checking. She wants to combine them and I'd like to keep them separate. I guess my only reason is so that we keep our discretionary spending on one another separate (meaning gifts). For those of you with joint checking accounts, how do you keep birthday gifts, etc a secret? Separate credit cards?

#21 Inimicus

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 09:47 AM

In our situation its got nothing to do with trust why we don't have joint accounts. We were together for 4 years before we got married..what worked for us with bills, worked for us..so we didn't change it. We've now been together for almost 13 years and keeping it separate still works. I do better with money when it's on a debit card..he prefers cash. I know exactly what's being spent b/c I'm the only one swiping on the account. We honestly never really argue or fight..but when we do money is never one of those things.



I hope that I didn't offend. I actually had a much longer post but erased it for fear I would step on toes. I know it works for some people, I just couldn't do it.

For me joint finances is one of the cornerstones of very successful 25 year marriage.


We tried separating accounts once years ago and it had two major flaws for us.

1. She had access to my account and vice-verse so when she was light one month and wanted some thing I just gave her the cash and she did the same for me when the situation was reversed. I wasn't going to make her go without something she wanted when I had extra so the overhead of two accounts became more trouble than it was worth.

2. There was always a tension around money and how to divide it up. % of household earnings? 50/50? and then who gets what bills? Does the person paying the natural gas bill get extra in the winter and the person with the electric get more in the summer? How do you deal with an emergency when one person has been very frugal and can pay for repairs to the car that were unbudgeted? Do they get punished for not spending? Crap like that kept popping up and it was causing more disagreements than it was solving so we ditched it.

#22 Carolina Husker

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 10:20 AM

We have separate accounts just because we lived together for two years first and it was a pain to link everything after we got married. She writes me a check at the beginning of every month for her car and a portion of the mortgage. She buys the groceries and vet bills, and I pay for everything else.

Haven't had an issue yet.

#23 Mrs Pantherfan

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 10:23 AM

like...and actual check? out of that checkbook thingie?? :)

#24 Carolina Husker

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 10:29 AM

She pays in racoon pelts and Iroquois wampum.

#25 ARSEN

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 10:34 AM

I'm glad this question was asked. The fiancee and I have been discussing this recently. We have a joint savings account already but are discussing what to do with checking. She wants to combine them and I'd like to keep them separate. I guess my only reason is so that we keep our discretionary spending on one another separate (meaning gifts). For those of you with joint checking accounts, how do you keep birthday gifts, etc a secret? Separate credit cards?


Yeap. We have our own credit cards for stuff like eating out with coworkers, car maintenance, etc. And we have a joint credit card for groceries and home goods. I'd buy something for her and she'd have no clue.

#26 ARSEN

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 10:39 AM

I'm glad this question was asked. The fiancee and I have been discussing this recently. We have a joint savings account already but are discussing what to do with checking. She wants to combine them and I'd like to keep them separate. I guess my only reason is so that we keep our discretionary spending on one another separate (meaning gifts). For those of you with joint checking accounts, how do you keep birthday gifts, etc a secret? Separate credit cards?


Yeap. We have our own credit cards for stuff like eating out with coworkers, car maintenance, etc. And we have a joint credit card for groceries and home goods. I'd buy something for her and she'd have no clue.

#27 logic1977

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 11:06 AM

My wife and i had a lot of fri tion initally on the seperate accounts. She thought they should be join also. Mostly what changed was she went back to school so it was all my money for a few years. And then when she got out o school and got a decent job she very much wanted to feel like she has "her" money.

Its all gravy now

#28 catfang

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 11:12 AM

Separate accounts, one joint for bill paying. I transfer $ into that account and she pays the bills. What's left is mine (not very much :( )

#29 PhillyB

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 11:46 AM

both. we kept the credit unions we both had (different ones) so we each have money deposited into different accounts, but credit cards run through the same place.

she pays the bills, i'm paying off the house. we're pretty focused so there really isn't much leeway as far as one of us spending more on random poo, so it works pretty well.

#30 thefuzz

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Posted 11 February 2013 - 11:56 AM

I have been pretty curious about this as well.

She makes far less than I do, but it's more reliable. Not really sure how we are going to handle this.


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