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Help for the Sexually Inexperienced


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#136 The_Light_Brigade

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 04:17 PM

Teh sexay time should never be a currency.


I don't particularly have a problem with it. And it really doesn't work that way I've just noticed a correlation between me getting poo done around the house and then later in the bedroom. I guess it's more of an unspoken agreement than currency.

#137 Darth Biscuit

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 04:25 PM

I don't particularly have a problem with it. And it really doesn't work that way I've just noticed a correlation between me getting poo done around the house and then later in the bedroom. I guess it's more of an unspoken agreement than currency.


My theory on that is, as long as everyone is happy... let it ride. If it becomes an issue with one of you, that's when the problem comes in.


#138 The_Light_Brigade

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 04:27 PM

My theory on that is, as long as everyone is happy... let it ride. If it becomes an issue with one of you, that's when the problem comes in.


Let me tell you Inflation is not just a problem with the dollar bill! HIIIIIIIIIYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

#139 Porn Shop Clerk

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 04:30 PM

She is really not taking to the dirty talk. She's more of a what have you done for me lately kind of woman. I scratch her back by doing things around the house, she realizes i'm out for poon, she in turn has to give up said pussy. Its a vicious circle but at least I know what I have to do to get some pussy.


sucks bro

but you never know, maybe next time she'll bring her A game

also it does turn women on when you can fix your own car, do poo around the house right, and basically contribute overall to the living situation

#140 The_Light_Brigade

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 04:33 PM

also it does turn women on when you can fix your own car, do poo around the house right, and basically contribute overall to the living situation


Couldn't agree more. That's like foreplay to her.

#141 Panthers_Lover

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 05:08 PM

the hell with sexting ... i've been known to write erotic stories that include his fantasies (yes, i know what they are) and mine ... or just tell him exactly what i'm going to do to him the next time i see him ... then email them to him. i also email him nekkid pictures ... of me, or other women ... i know what he likes.

#142 LifeisaGarden

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 05:09 PM

I wonder how many Huddlers are getting some today because of this thread. You can all thank me now.

#143 Mr. Scot

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 05:47 PM

Yes, I know. I was kidding. Its just an old joke b/t me & biscuit..if he remembers. I am in no way suggesting someone rape their wife. That would be unbelievably horrible.


Long time back, was with a girl who was highly orgasmic, constantly horny, pretty flexible and up for pretty much anything. Her idea of "dirty talk" in mid-action was to say things like "rape me" (said that an awful lot), and sometimes "f--k me daddy" too :blink:

Control is fun, but I got a little uncomfortable with some of the stuff she said , especially after learning her dad was an abusive SOB. She swore that although he was mean to her he never molested her :unsure:


I know one thing that helps maintain connection is touch. It doesn't need to be sexual. Just a basic touch on the arm or rub of the back. Brush up against each other as you walk by. It let's the other person know you are thinking about them.


Agree completely. Every single touch can be a way of saying "I love you".

#144 Mr. Scot

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 05:52 PM

While I'm at it...

There are reasons I'm divorced. Issues in the bedroom are not among them. The ex and I were rabbits, and she was adventurous so we tried quite a few things.

One of my favorite "spicy" things to do was to catch her cooking, cleaning or just doing some mundane thing. I'd sneak up behind her, grab her shoulder and start kissing and nibbling her neck. Then I'd start touching her in all the spots where I knew she liked it best. I'd get her to the point where I could tell she was pretty well ready to go and then...

...stop and walk away :blink:

Cruel? Wrong? Evil? Perhaps, but to be fair I always made up for it that night :D

#145 LifeisaGarden

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 10:54 PM

While I'm at it...

There are reasons I'm divorced. Issues in the bedroom are not among them. The ex and I were rabbits, and she was adventurous so we tried quite a few things.

One of my favorite "spicy" things to do was to catch her cooking, cleaning or just doing some mundane thing. I'd sneak up behind her, grab her shoulder and start kissing and nibbling her neck. Then I'd start touching her in all the spots where I knew she liked it best. I'd get her to the point where I could tell she was pretty well ready to go and then...

...stop and walk away :blink:

Cruel? Wrong? Evil? Perhaps, but to be fair I always made up for it that night :D



That made me shutter. Oh my, how could you be so rotten!?

#146 googoodan

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Posted 28 February 2013 - 11:07 PM

Come on guys, you can't just start sexting out of the blue like that. You gotta work it into the conversation.
I know everyone's relationship with their spouse is different, and my wife generally gets the joke when I call her the dishwasher. If she asked me if I ran the dishwasher this morning, my response would have been along the lines of "I was kinda hoping to ram the dishwasher tonight"



#147 Herbert The Love Bug

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Posted 01 March 2013 - 12:53 AM

be as fast as possible, clean your dick, turn tv on

#148 Herbert The Love Bug

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Posted 01 March 2013 - 12:54 AM

I wonder how many Huddlers are getting some today because of this thread. You can all thank me now.


my hand gave it to me 3 times today

#149 Kevin Greene

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Posted 01 March 2013 - 01:16 AM

I wonder how many Huddlers are getting some today because of this thread. You can all thank me now.



Yeah...now how about a sammich thread.
You know the best post coitus MVP sammich thread.

#150 Mr. Scot

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Posted 01 March 2013 - 02:10 AM

That made me shutter. Oh my, how could you be so rotten!?


Because the results were worth it :D

Now in the interest of full disclosure, she got me too sometimes. One of her tricks was to catch me leaving for work but before I got out the door, to grab me, shove me against the door, kneel down and, to quote Tony Montana, say hello to my little friend :blink:

Except she didn't finish the task...

She'd do enough to get me going, then stop, zip me up, give me a coy smile and say "have fun at work" :wacko:

I had to walk very discreetly to my car and try to "normalize" on the drive to the office. Once I got to the office, then the texts started, and by the time I got home I had essentially reverted to being a teenage boy again :lol:

A girl I dated after her used to like to gain a "competitive advantage" by wearing something revealing or whispering things in my ear when we were playing pool, bowling, playing mini golf or some such activity. That was fun too. A lot to be said for a woman who knows how to use her femininity to be playful.

Bottom Line: The best kind of seduction is the kind that goes on all through the day rather than just starting after you get under the covers. Lot of things my ex-wife didn't understand, but she did understand that. And since I did too, well...like I said, that part of our marriage wasn't a problem.


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