Why do you feel the need to consistently discuss your bowel movements, does looking in the mirror remind you of poo?
I was thinking that your nose is so incredibly big, it's basically a medical deformity. Therefore, if we go to one of the fundraiser sites, I think we can get a rhinoplasty fund going. But here's the genius part, we get the surgeon to do a two job discount so you can bring the wife also. If not, there could be some good money doing circus freaks sideshow. You can be elephant man, has a nose like a trunk!
See, it's not all money with me, I can do charity work too!
shouldn't you be making sweet love to your $4,500 custom lumber-supporting SelectComfortTM body pillow?