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I'm crafting a carefully-written letter to Jerry Richardson. What should I say?


Best Answer X-Clown, 16 September 2013 - 11:05 PM

Print out one of Alice's threads where he's showing off his shoes and foreign currencies and let him know that these are the type of people that panther fans have to put up with when we are losing. Go to the full post


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#1 PhillyB

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:48 PM

I've typed up a two-page draft. All ideas, mind-blowing stats, witty lines, thematic ideas, presentation strategies, and general input is welcome.

 

i've already nixed my own idea of xeroxing my butt and printing it, so that one's out already.



#2 teeray

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:49 PM

How about thank you.

*ducks*

#3 SuperJTheGreat

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:49 PM

You're a bojangles owner. He will listen then.



#4 Zod

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:51 PM

Allow me...

 

Sup J-Dawg! Hows it hangin, Broseph.

Dude, can we get some ballers up in here yo?

Cordially,

PhillyB

 

 



#5 Zod

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:52 PM

*
A WHOLE PIE!

I've typed up a two-page draft. All ideas, mind-blowing stats, witty lines, thematic ideas, presentation strategies, and general input is welcome.

 

i've already nixed my own idea of xeroxing my butt and printing it, so that one's out already.

 

Draw him a pie chart featuring money spent on the panthers and happiness returned.



#6 CRA

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:52 PM

How about a pie chart with the number of winning seasons.....

#7 Growl

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:53 PM

Lol wait until you get the photocopied handwritten letter response back form his secretary through her email



#8 PhillyB

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:54 PM

Sup J-Dawg! Hows it hangin, Broseph.
Dude, can we get some ballers up in here yo?
Cordially,
PhillyB


i'm already editing my letter to exclude any words that weren't in common usage before 1975

#9 panthers90

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:54 PM

pie chart with games under 7 points we have won

pie chart with games we have lead going into the 4th, and lost

 

edit: in percentages cuz I guess that's how pie charts work.

second edit: photoshop panthers playing in an empty BOFA, and a full LA stadium.



#10 PhillyB

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:56 PM

How about a pie chart with the number of winning seasons.....


i've debated including this, but i don't want to come across as a complete asshat. i also declined to include any funny rivera memes.

#11 SZ James (banned)

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:56 PM

ncstateresize.jpg

KERRY RHODES=BALLER

#12 Barry McCaulkinor

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:56 PM

My letter would be a simple "fug You"



#13 pstall

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:57 PM

tell him you have an interwebs friend who has already raised 1412.72 via kickstarter in one day and if you don't act soon you will be the one handing out water bottles on Morehead.



#14 TANTRIC-NINJA

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:58 PM

I would start off by suggesting that he get that heart in the Nine Inch Nails "Closer" video.

At least we could get him to be in the mid 90's socially and be sorta steampunk cool.

I would then invite him to hang on my screen door sprayed with Flex Seal on Lake Norman because this is how OG pimps play!!

#15 FattyFatFat

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 04:58 PM

Hey jerr,


Remember that feeling you got when you caught the game winning touchdown pass from Johnny Unitas back in '59 to win the championship?

That's the exact opposite of the way we feel as fans of the Panthers.

Yours in Christ,
Phillip B.


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