My Player Supports Me
In light of all the controversy in the NFL I want to address the poor image pro athletes are getting because of a few bad guys.
Controlling, abusive, cheater these are the words that are associated with my husband and some of his closest friends and they are so far from the truth it makes me sick to my stomach.
I know some wives of athletes and retired athletes have spoken out and are making the same accusations as the media. "support the player and be quiet" "he's the star keep him happy" "he's making great money so support him and shut your mouth" Let me start by saying these women are in bad marriages and that has nothing to do with their husbands careers. If you truly believe "support the player and be quiet" you need to see a therapist because that is a personal issue, not something the NFL has ever instilled in wives. It has also been said that wives are expected to build their entire lives around their athlete husband, which again is not true. There is some truth in that my husband's career has a demanding schedule 6-9 months out of the year and certain things do revolve around his schedule... Isn't that the case for any family with working husbands and/or wives? Doesn't everyone's lives revolve around work to an extent? I do not build my entire life around my husband. My husband and I are a team and he supports me just as much as I support him. "Informal rules" and veteran wives warning rookie wives about how everything comes secondary to the team winning.... Um I am a 10 year veteran wife and I have never said anything like that. Informal rules such as planning off season babies and wives saying they received tons of grief for a poorly planned pregnancy during the season... I'm sorry but that's bullshit! As a wife you want an off season baby so your husband is home to help with the baby and enjoy your newborn child it has nothing to do with the team. I had my 3rd son sept 5 last year and leading up to the birth my husband was 100% prepared to miss practice to be with me. My husband's team was very supportive. He was allowed to have his phone on even in meetings and during practice the head trainer had his phone incase I went into labor. So unwritten rules are bullshit and things that these women have made up themselves. My husband is a husband and father first and a pro athlete second! No he did not get up every hour with our newborns but what man does? If the baby was up all night he would come relieve me once or twice which is more than most husbands, pro athlete or not! My husband does not believe it's only the woman's job to raise the children he takes every opportunity he gets to spend time with his children even if it's in the middle of the night. My husband does more for me than most of my friend's husbands outside of pro sports! How dare any pro athlete's wife try to give my husband a bad reputation because she has a bad husband. The majority of wives don't work- this is true, they can't because the husband doesn't want them and he wants her home- not so true. I have the privilege to stay home and raise my children because my husband works his ass off and I don't have to work. If I woke up tomorrow and wanted to work Chase would look at me and say ok what do you want to do and how can I help you? He supports me in whatever I do the same way I support him.
Infidelity... I am only going to talk about this briefly because it's so ridiculous I don't even want to give it a second thought! The "wink and nod" approach is one of the stupidest thing I have ever heard! If your husband is a cheater then he's a cheater... What does that have to do with all the other happily married faithful pro athletes! My husband has been in the NFL for 10 years and yes we have seen infidelity in the league and it is very sad but I have seen infidelity in teachers, bankers, lawyers, drs, and on and on and on. Infidelity is not just a problem in pro sports it's just focused on because athletes are constantly in the public eye and stereotyped as "players" and the wives let it happen because their husband is "famous" and making big money. My husband has never cheated on me and he does not believe in the "wink and nod" approach to infidelity.
Obviously all this started with the video released of Janay Rice getting knocked out by her then fiance Ray Rice. Everyone is talking about why she stayed and why she's supporting him. Unless you've been in a domestic violence situation or are a licensed psychologist you should not be commenting on this subject at all! People are saying an NFL wife is expected to wrap her entire identity in her husband and his team so leaving means not just leaving their marriage and money but their identity! If you wrap your entire identity in anyone but yourself that is a personal issue you need to deal with. I am my own person. I am Megan Blackburn and my husband is Chase Blackburn. I am a wife, mother, daughter, sister, granddaughter, runner, pilates addict, sweets fanatic, baker, and I could keep going but I don't want to bore you! I am my own person and my identity has nothing to do with my husband's career. The same goes for him! He is a husband and father first and an NFL player second!
So I hope this clears up the misconceptions out there about pro athletes. My husband is not a stereotype and not one of my NFL girlfriends' husbands is one either. Being in the NFL for 10 years you meet a lot of women and I can count on one hand the wives that fit the stereotype pro athlete wife! Please don't believe everything you read or hear about pro athletes. We are normal people!