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jtnc, January 8, 2013
Posted January 8, 2013
this fundamentalist religious stuff you're being brought up on is actually insane
If a guy with a high-pitched voice and a shiny glove invites you over to his house, say no.
Listen to Dr Dre, he is a scholar.
Start up a site called facebook.
Fug bitches errrryyyday
Don't buy stocks... Instead, have unprotected sex with every girl who wants to "talk to you." They don't want to fall in love and date you. They want your magic stick. Give it to them.
You'll be on the verge of a threesome at 16 with two hot girls rubbing and licking on your six-pack in a bed. Your friend will be angry and cockblock you... Don't take him with you.
You'll still meet your wife and have a wonderful life, you'll just have had a lot more sex. You're welcome. /farts into millions of tiny particles
Start kicking field goals so you can get a free ride in college.
And another thing...
If you ever have a problem with a peer, don't listen to your parents... PUNCH THAT MF'ER IN THE THROAT. Get in as many physical altercations as you can before high school... Then it's still fun and you don't go to jail for it.
That whole thing they keep telling you about your permanent record from school affecting you for the rest of your life...
Yeah, it's crap.
20 years later...still no cure for herpes.
Just kidding. I don't know if I would really have changed much.
learn the act of balancing fun and work...too much of either isn't good for the other
don't tie yourself to one girl so damn young...go forth and practice with many women instead
pay yourself first