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Well, I feel like a failure even though I shouldn't...

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#31 TNPanther


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Posted 23 January 2013 - 04:10 PM

You guys are right. By focusing on my education I can establish a proper identity for myself. Besides in twenty years nobody is going to give two fugs about which fraternity I was in, but will give two fugs about the degree and job I have. Thanks for the comments.

#32 Murph


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Posted 23 January 2013 - 04:21 PM

1. Go to college at the beach with 67% females.
2. Wander to every party you feel like going to.
3. ??????
4. Profit.

Posted Image
Yup :rock:

#33 mr beauxjangles

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 04:48 PM

I wasn't in a fraternity in college but my fiancé (who I met after college) joined a sorority her sophomore year at UGA. She didn't want to go through the experience freshman year but wound up being close friends with five or six girls that had just rushed and joined the same sorority. And while she is still great friends with those same five or six, she made far more friends outside the sorority in the dorms than they did freshman year. She wound up bringing those two groups of friends together later in life now that they/we live in Atlanta. Long story short...you could still be friends with those guys. Not sure how the whole rushing thing works but assume you could rush again next year.

#34 pstall


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Posted 23 January 2013 - 10:14 PM

<-- no frat for me and i have deep friendships all over the world.

you will find some you connect with and before you know it you will have your own little empire going.

lead the way and help others and have bold dreams, that will keep you moving.

#35 Delhommey



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Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:10 AM

Yeah, when I was at CofC we felt sorry for the people in frats: they were forced to go to the frat parties in the houses while we went to loft parties on King St, 15 keg ragers on Cannon, or bonfires out on Folly.

Even in a big school you can find a party though. Talk to everyone (or at least pretend to listen), be confident, and be positive. You will end up at plenty of fun events.

#36 Seal (SmittyIsOurSavior)

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:18 AM

Posted Image
Yup :rock:

I miss the Dub. The girls are like the classes. Easy with little effort.

UNC is essentially the opposite, although we still have a lot of attractive girls.

#37 PhillyB


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Posted 24 January 2013 - 02:01 AM

I told you go travel for a semester

#38 thefuzz


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Posted 24 January 2013 - 09:59 AM

Don't sweat it man, you can always rush again, for multiple frats.

I was not in a frat, but only dated sorority girls, just kinda my "thing".

Couple of rules though:

1. Get out of your room. Most are homesick, bored, scared, loners, as freshmen but you have to get out.

2. Video games will not win you any real friends.

3. Focus on your education, long term that's your best bet.

4. Dedicate at least 25 hours per week to school/studying. Most college kids don't do this.

5. Don't work as a delivery driver, at least work as a server at a restaurant.

6. Join some clubs, with some females in it. Maybe tennis, volleyball, etc....

#39 Happy Panther

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 10:16 AM

This past week was spring rush for my college and I was certain that I was going to get a bid from a particular fraternity only to find out that they didn't want me. I know it's not a huge deal, but I really liked them and thought that I'd fit in well with them. I didn't really rush any other fraternities so I ultimately did not receive any bids. I feel pretty down right now and expressing my thoughts here has helped me in the past, so here I am.

Thoughts? Is it even that big of a deal?

If you are close to one of the brothers you could ask him to put your forward again.

#40 CarolinaNCSU


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Posted 24 January 2013 - 10:58 AM

No frat for me, but I've dated sorority girls from UNC and Elon and hung around with plenty of frat guys. I'll just say they're mostly not my cup of tea, although some have become friends.

As someone about to graduate in May, one of my biggest regrets is not making more friends outside of my roommates/people from my hometown. As simple as it may sound, and as scary as it can be (it is for me), just talk to somebody. Whether it be in class, a club, IM sports, anything, just talk. When I'm on campus, my face is either in my cell phone or laptop, I listen to the lectures/take notes and go home. I regret it like Hell, too. You won't need a frat to fit in or make friends, just step outside of your comfort zone a little bit and see what happens.

#41 Hawk



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Posted 24 January 2013 - 11:57 AM

developing your identity and being part of a frat really seem to have no connection to me!!

develop your identity first...then find a group that belongs with you!

#42 PhillyB


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Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:50 PM

learn to play guitar. when you're halfway decent, sit around on campus and play and rake in the ladies. then return to this thread and thank phillyb.

#43 Lomez


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Posted 24 January 2013 - 05:32 PM

So I guess I'm in the minority here as I was Greek in college. TN, I'll be honest: joining Lambda Chi was one of the best decisions I ever made. I have lifelong friends and our bond goes deeper than that of my other/high school friends. It never once hindered my ability to have a good GPA (if anything I spent more time in the library due to mandatory study hall every week) and it truly made my college experience unique and memorable.

That being said, the worst thing you can do is join the wrong fraternity/chapter or join one that is only about drinking and hazing. If it's meant to be, the right organization will give you a bid. You could even try to rush again and talk to different chapters the next time around. If you don't get a bid or decide not to try again, then find other ways to get yourself involved on campus. Intramurals, clubs, whatever it may be. Make some friends in different dorms, and branch out as best you can.

I will say this, though: joining a fraternity is great for networking after you leave college. It's nice to create connections either through active or alumni brothers for help in getting a job.

#44 Boner Champ

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 06:32 PM

1. Go to college at the beach with 67% females.
2. Wander to every party you feel like going to.
3. ??????
4. Profit.

Then join a Frat at coastal College and multiply everything above by 10x

#45 pir8fan05



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Posted 24 January 2013 - 07:02 PM

Start selling drugs

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