Jump to content
  • Welcome!

    Register and log in easily with Twitter or Google accounts!

    Or simply create a new Huddle account. 

    Members receive fewer ads , access our dark theme, and the ability to join the discussion!

     

Fake Invoice Needed


Jbro

Recommended Posts

Original Craigslist ad:

ATTENTION: anyone who owns an auto repair shop

i need a fake invoice printed up for a bunch of car work so i can explain to my wife where our $1200 went. if you can print out an invoice with a bunch of repair stuff that would cost around that, please contact me ASAP.

From Me to *********@********.org:

Hey, are you still looking to get a fake invoice? I run a repair shop off of 95 in Essington and could easily print something out for you.

Mike

From Dave ******** to Me:

yea dude that would be great. it needs to be for like $1200 but your a mechanic im sure you can think of something that costs that much. essington is kinda out of my way so i just need a good reason for my wife that explains why i was down there, ya hear?

From Me to Dave ********:

Alright, I can print one out in a few minutes and scan it for you. As for your wife, just tell her you were on your way to Chester to buy drugs and your car broke down, so you just had it towed to the nearest shop. Be sure to mention how great our service was.

Mike

From Dave ******** to Me:

yeah great idea genius that would go over real well. im better off coming clean about my bad luck in atlantic city, but that aint happenin neither

From Me to Dave ********:

I don't see why it wouldn't go over well. Lots of people go out of their way to Chester for drugs. I get my coke from Chester all of the time. It is cheap, and good, too.

Anyway, I've attached the invoice I wrote up for you. I forgot to ask the Make/Model/Year of your car, so I just took a guess. If I am wrong, let me know and I can change it.

Mike

Attachment:

invoice.png

From Dave ******** to Me:

if you guessed 98 corolla then id be impressed otherwise could you put that in, and date it for today? thanks a lot for your help dude

From Dave ******** to Me:

wait a minute what the f**k is this poo

From Dave ******** to Me:

$200 to unjam a tape deck are you for real man? that isnt even a real problem

what the f**k is a "transgasket differential" are you serious dude, this poo isnt going to fly. 50 bucks to set the dashboard clock wtf man

like seriously man are you f**king retarded? wtf is this bullshit

From Me to Dave ********:

Yes, I typically charge around $200 to unjam a tape deck. Have you ever tried to do it? It is a pain in the ass. Some people panic and try to rewind their tapes and that just makes it even worse.

I charge $50 to set the dashboard clock, but it is well worth every penny. It is the most accurate time reading you will ever have. I sync it down to the millisecond with the official NIST time, and I have it verified by a certified time expert.

You've got me there on the transgasket differential. I just make that up and charge $400 for it and people usually pay it without much argument. Especially women, which brings me to my next point.

Women tend to know nothing about cars, so your wife will probably just look at the document and get confused by all that fancy car lingo. All women need to see is the money amount, which I have made very clear at the bottom of the invoice.

Mike

From Dave ******** to Me:

cmon man quit dicking me around and put some real poo on there. i dont know what kind of bullshit shop you are running over there, but neither me or my wife would believe this thing

and fix the car info. out of all the guesses you could have made you guessed that i drive a f**king delorean? for real dude?

From Me to Dave ********:

Sorry, you just struck me as the kind of guy who would have a DeLorean.

If you really think your wife isn't going to fall for that, I'll give you a more realistic looking document. Here is a realistic bank statement you can use to show your wife where your money went.

Mike

Attachment:

statement.png

From Dave ******** to Me:

wow thats great buddy thanks for nothing you f**king retard

hey why dont you go f**k yourself in the ass with your transgasket differential. what a douchebag

http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=93#comment

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A buddy of mine and I tried to replaced my biaxle manifold last week. We were using a metric biaxle manifold tool on a standard manifold. Turns out we installed it upside down. I still had to take it to a mechanic to get it installed right and it cost me an extra $450.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A buddy of mine and I tried to replaced my biaxle manifold last week. We were using a metric biaxle manifold tool on a standard manifold. Turns out we installed it upside down. I still had to take it to a mechanic to get it installed right and it cost me an extra $450.

I knew you were lying after reading the first four words.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


  • PMH4OWPW7JD2TDGWZKTOYL2T3E.jpg

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • You are making a huge assumption that this team will draft a center, and then subsequently hit on that center pick.
    • I may have hit a jackpot mock for us.  Albeit I didn't get the OT I wanted the pick was still solid.  Here is the AI analysis. That is an intriguing class you’ve put together. You definitely followed a "Best Player Available" strategy after those first two picks, but looking at the scouting profiles for these guys in 2026, you might have built a much higher floor for the Panthers' defense than it looks at first glance. Here is a breakdown of your draft haul: The "Home Runs" (Round 1) 25. C.J. Allen (LB, Georgia): You nailed the "alpha" of the defense here. Scouts are calling him a Pro Bowl-caliber MIKE with elite football IQ. For a Panthers team that has struggled with linebacker consistency, Allen is a "plug-and-play" starter who can communicate the defense from Day 1. 28. T.J. Parker (EDGE, Clemson): Getting Parker at 28 is a massive value. He’s often compared to Rashan Gary because of his elite raw traits. Even if his sack numbers fluctuated in college, his ability to set the edge and use his power to collapse the pocket is exactly what Ejiro Evero needs to complement the interior pressure from Derrick Brown. The Trench Reinforcements 70. Drew Shelton (OT, Penn State): This is a savvy pick for depth. Shelton is praised for his footwork and "swing tackle" versatility. Given the importance of keeping Bryce Young upright, having a high-floor OT who can play both sides is a great insurance policy. 119. Logan Jones (OC, Iowa): You grabbed the Rimington Award winner (best center in college football) in the 4th round. While he’s slightly undersized, he’s an elite zone-blocker. In Dave Canales’ system, his mobility and ability to get to the second level could be a game-changer for the run game. The Late-Round Sleepers 201. Cole Payton (QB, NDSU): I think your "Taysom Hill" comparison is spot on. Payton finished 2025 with the highest PFF grade in the FCS (97.3). He’s a rugged, 230-pound dual-threat who rushed for over 1,000 yards in a season. Using him as a short-yardage "wildcat" specialist or a developmental backup for Bryce is a low-risk, high-reward move that fits Canales' aggressive 4th-down philosophy perfectly. 198. Dae'Quan Wright (TE, Ole Miss): He really popped in 2025 with over 600 yards and 5 TDs. He’s more of a "big receiver" type at TE, which gives Bryce another middle-of-the-field target. Those two picks in the middle rounds are arguably your most "Ejiro Evero-friendly" selections. They both fit the modern NFL mold of versatile, high-IQ defensive backs who can be moved around like chess pieces. Here’s why they look like smart value picks: 102. Devin Moore (CB, Florida) Moore is a fascinating prospect because he looks like he was "built in a lab." At nearly 6'3" with a massive wingspan, he is exactly the kind of press-coverage corner that NFL teams are obsessing over right now. The Upside: He finished 2025 with one of the highest PFF coverage grades in the SEC (82.7). He’s incredibly "sticky" in man coverage and has the speed to stay attached to vertical threats. The Value: He likely fell to the 4th round because of a rocky injury history early in his career, but he finally stayed healthy in 2025. If he stays on the field, you’ve essentially landed a 1st-round talent at pick 102. Panthers Fit: He provides a massive contrast to Jaycee Horn's style, giving you a secondary with two legitimate "shut down" frames. 135. Keionte Scott (S/NB, Miami) If Devin Moore is the "finesse" athlete, Keionte Scott is the "enforcer." Though listed as a safety in your draft, he played a massive role at nickel for Miami’s 2025 National Championship run. The "Dawg" Factor: Scouting reports consistently describe him as playing with "his hair on fire." He is a violent tackler and a prolific blitzer—he racked up 5 sacks and 13 tackles for loss in 2025, which is insane for a defensive back. Versatility: He can play single-high safety, slide down to cover the slot, or even play outside in a pinch. He also brings value as an elite punt returner. Panthers Fit: He’s the perfect "Swiss Army Knife" for Evero’s disguise-heavy defense. He and your QB pick, Cole Payton, seem to share that high-motor, "any role needed" mentality. Summary: You’ve essentially drafted a prototype boundary corner (Moore) and a dynamic slot/safety hybrid (Scott). Moore handles the deep threats, and Scott handles the "trash" near the line of scrimmage. Between these two and your 1st rounders (Allen and Parker), you’ve basically rebuilt the spine of the Panthers' defense in a single weekend. The Verdict: You successfully addressed the pass rush and linebacker issues that have plagued Carolina, while adding a creative offensive weapon in Payton. Plus, snagging a 2027 Dallas 2nd-rounder while keeping your own picks is a "masterclass" in asset management. It gives you huge flexibility for next year's draft.
    • He is already counting that NBA payday coming. 
×
×
  • Create New...