Along time ago when a Jet fighter pilot from our squadron was being reassigned to the Koren field of battle he would buzz our airbase that way. If you were working on the flight line and not looking around it would literally scare the hell out of you. What were they going to do to the pilot? ground him and not send him to Korea? So.. it was overlooked.
Get your dentist to prescribe a penicillin. that should hold you for a month or so, usually does for me. Give you time to save up for the root canal. You should try to bargain with the dentist for a cut in the fee because you have no insurance.
Geez, SCP, now that you are in this composing mood you should pen a manual on the best places to poo. You could call it "SCPs' Pleasant Places To POO" and sell it to AAA to be sent out to their members along with all of the road maps.