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neverlosethefeeling

Need some serious advice

47 posts in this topic

tell your sister to go by the lease office tomorrow and tell them what's going on...CALMLY and tell them it's causing a problem. They'll probably tell you that if he's staying there then he needs to be added on the lease, fill out a form, pay a $300 fee, and start paying 1/3 of the rent. As long as they're on the lease half and half, then he really can't stay there that much without paying the fees and such.

When you force him to make it official then it hits home more.

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confrontation is overrated sometimes....superglue in his locks and slashing his tires without telling anyone including your sister until a few years down the road can go a long way....

I could see that if the guy were just a douchebag, but this guy sounds more like a bully than a douchebag. Bullies generally only respond to strength.

Anybody willing to intimidate and/or threaten a woman needs to be dealt with directly.

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I think in the interest of the sister's long term safety, this guy needs to have the boundries set, just not tonight. Not unless it flares up again.

Also keep in mind your sister is very worked up, and when you're emotional, stories aren't always told correctly.

If your sister is safe, let her tell you what happened after she's calmed down and had a night of sleep. I'd still let the guy know bad things await the man who doesn't treat your sister right.

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Whatever you do, prayers and best wishes from me.

(I'm out for the night)

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Challenge him to guitar hero. It worked in that new Vince Vaughan movie.

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Not one single suggestion that she talk to her roommate?

She needs a heart to heart with the roommate. If they work it out, fine, otherwise the roommate needs to take over the lease herself.

Or, make the guy an offer he cant refuse.

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Yes to talking to the roommate but I would suggest this.

Dude blowing up like that for something that menial is a ticking bomb.

I would STRONGLY suggest your sister finding a new place to stay ASAP. Not saying break the lease but start looking at a place on the sly etc.

Without knowing the dynamic of the roommates(how long have they known each other, did they meet in college, high school) the roommate may be just as wacky.

Maybe while she is working on talking to the roommate I would try to find out the roommate's schedule and see if you can drop by from time to time to "check in". Not intervening per se but just do what bro's do.

If you see/meet the boyfriend, do NOT bring this up off the bat. See if it's possible to find a common intererst(oh you play Call of Duty as well? oh you like explosives?) and build that bridge.

But heres the thing and you just gotta trust me...even if you make some inroads, I still say ger her OUT of that situation.

Nip it in the bud and get her where not only can she study and do well but to be safe.

Finally and I'm also not joking. If you need ANY help with this cat, let me or us know.

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I agree with Delhommey on this one. If its still an immediate issue tonight, or if a similar situation happens again, your sister should ask him to leave. If he won't leave, call the police. He is trespassing. Have your sister call you and then call the police when you arrive. Don't tell him. Just let the police show up.

It's better for him to get charged with trespassing than for you to get charged with assault.

Again, agree with Delhommey as well. And if your sister really does fear for her safety, I'd discuss pstall's option with her as well.

I'd also sit down with your sister's friend/roommate. How would she like it if your sister's boyfriend sat around their place all the time, yelled at her, cussed at her, and made her fear for her safety?

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If that was me. I would calmly come to him and ask him to what the deal was. If he starts bitching, I would say... "listen, she's my sister and you cannot talk to her like that. If you ever yell at her again, I will take this problem to another level. Got it?" If he says "No" just say "Alright, just letting you know" Whatever he says afterwards it doesnt matter, just walk away. Never play pussy with the hotheads, they will disrespect you more.

One hothead was mean to my sister once, I got my hockey-stick and whack him right in the face. He went from badass to a pussy in less than a second. True magic.

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