Jump to content
  • Welcome!

    Register and log in easily with Twitter or Google accounts!

    Or simply create a new Huddle account. 

    Members receive fewer ads , access our dark theme, and the ability to join the discussion!

     

He just went to the bathroom


Jangler

Recommended Posts

shheeeesshhhhh...

http://www.dailycamera.com/boulder-county-news/ci_18322902?source=most_viewed

Boulder police are looking for a man who hid in the tank of a portable toilet at a yoga festival before running off.

A woman at the Hanuman Festival went into the portable toilet Friday and noticed something moving in the tank when she lifted the lid, according to police spokeswoman Kim Kobel. The woman exited and asked a man nearby to look inside the tank.

The man told police he saw something moving under a tarp, and when he left the toilet he heard it lock from the inside.

A security supervisor then waited outside for the person to emerge. When he did, the supervisor tried to get him to sit down, Kobel said, but he ran off, covered in feces.

The suspect, who was not wearing a shirt or shoes when he came out of the toilet, was described as a white man in his 20s wearing gray sweatpants, around 6-foot-5 to 6-foot-8-inches tall with a skinny build and black hair.

Witnesses also said he had cuts on his back and arms. Some at the festival said he might be a transient who goes by the name "Sky."

Kobel said police are not sure how he was able to squeeze into the tank or what he was doing there. He is being sought on suspicion of criminal attempt to make unlawful sexual contact.

I guess he wanted to skip the relationship part and just get shat on directly.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


  • PMH4OWPW7JD2TDGWZKTOYL2T3E.jpg

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • That is just Panthers history pain speaking.
    • From what I gather, sure it allows you more room in that you can manipulate the cap more due to smaller prorated amounts to fit salaries in, but for cap purposes, you're still on the hook for the money at the end of the day.    "ChatGPT You said: What are the advantages for NFL teams to sign larger signing bonuses? ChatGPT said: NFL teams often use large signing bonuses as a strategic tool in contracts. While they cost real cash up front, they offer several advantages, especially when it comes to salary cap management, player retention, and negotiation leverage. Here's a breakdown of the benefits: ✅ 1. Salary Cap Flexibility Signing bonuses are prorated over the life of the contract (up to 5 years) for salary cap purposes. This allows teams to spread out the cap hit, even if the player receives the money immediately. Example: A $20M signing bonus on a 4-year deal counts only $5M/year against the cap. ✅ 2. Attracting Top Talent Players love signing bonuses because they're guaranteed money paid up front. Offering a bigger signing bonus can sweeten the deal without inflating yearly salaries. ✅ 3. Front-Loading Real Cash, Not Cap Teams with strong cash flow can pay big bonuses now while minimizing the immediate cap hit. Useful for teams trying to build around rookie QB contracts or with flexible cash budgets. ✅ 4. Locking in Key Players Larger bonuses make it harder for a player to be released early due to dead cap consequences. This can create more job security for the player and roster continuity for the team. ✅ 5. Leverage in Restructures Big signing bonuses create future cap hits via proration. Teams can later restructure deals (e.g., convert salary to bonus) to create even more cap space. ✅ 6. Competitive Edge In free agency, a team offering more guaranteed cash up front often wins the bidding war, even if the total contract value is lower than another team's. ⚠️ Key Caveat: Large signing bonuses increase dead cap risk if the player is cut or traded early."   I think that roster bonuses can be a useful tool if you're trying to keep players in by manipulating numbers and spreading the hit over time, but I don't think that it's something that you want to use unless it's "necessary." I don't know that you want to get into signing rookies on roster bonuses, as the bust rate is relatively high.    
    • not even if that team in New Orleans disbands before the first game.  Saw one 2026 mock that had them drafting first next year.  
×
×
  • Create New...