wow, that's tough man.
I guess I'll never understand the way some people think. I can't imagine anything that my sons could do to disappoint me so much that I wouldn't want to have a relationship with them.
yeah it's dumb. there was a lot of physical and verbal abuse when i was growing up, it was a really toxic environment but he never really ceased contact entirely until i blew my knees out and got a rejection notice from the marine corps and moved out and started "dressing like a punk" (khaki cargoes and flip flops lol... he's stuck in the 60's) and listening to evil satan rock music (back then it was christian rock... again lol) and subsequently quit my job and traveled the world. then any contact was solely to insist i'd be homeless, never publish a book, etc.
once i started bartending he cut me off completely, told me he didn't consider me related to him anymore, refused to come to my wedding in spite of repeated invites, and when he found out my wife was pregnant he told my mom that he didn't want any part of the baby's life, etc.
in retrospect there is good to come of it because i'm now very conscious of the necessity to do everything i can to not be a complete dick of a father