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Member Since 25 Nov 2008
Offline Last Active May 08 2014 10:10 AM

#2470071 wife is going to boston for 2 weeks for work training with a bunch of kids fr...

Posted by Epistaxis on 06 November 2013 - 12:01 PM

Nah, just busy with kids and work.


Things have slowed down a bit so I figured I'd show up and annoy you guys again.

#2470065 wife is going to boston for 2 weeks for work training with a bunch of kids fr...

Posted by Epistaxis on 06 November 2013 - 11:58 AM

You could hire a PI.


Preferably one with an awesome mustache, a Ferrari, and lives with a smarmy British guy.

#2468514 Anger: how to deal.

Posted by Epistaxis on 05 November 2013 - 12:04 PM

When life throws a lot of crap at you all at once, I think the best thing you can do is prioritize.


It is unrealistic to expect that you can "deal with it all".


Instead, deal with the most important issue first.


In my mind, that means you temporarily put all your personal crap on hold. As an NCO, it is up to you to get your guys and yourself home in one piece, while still accomplishing your mission to the best of your ability. That is enough to occupy your mind. Totally immerse yourself in that task.


Once this deployment is over, prioritize again. What is number one AFTER that? Girlfriend situation? Fine. Deal with it. Accomplish the goal. Move the chains to the next priority.


Move the chains. Methodical. Plan. Execute.

#2167880 2012 Ohio School Shooter

Posted by Epistaxis on 19 March 2013 - 04:31 PM

This is another one of those cases that I'm talking about...expedited death penalty for no contest/facts not in question/guilty plea scumbags. It shows my brother was right...you'd be surprised how many of these jerks admit it or are caught red handed.

In those cases, you should be able to get these jokers in and out of the court system in a matter of weeks if not days.

Then dead. No money wasted. No oxygen wasted.

#2042352 Christmas Traditions You Could live Without

Posted by Epistaxis on 11 December 2012 - 03:31 PM


My mom insists on reading the bible and placing the damn baby jesus in the manger at the right moment.

Me, you know, the atheist guy?

I'm an asshole, but I'm not the world's biggest asshole...yet...so I haven't refused my turn in the pass the fictional mythology group book reading and wooden infant resettling tradition.

My 7 year old daughter last year asked me why they do it.
I said it is tradition.
No poo she said "That's gay".

I love her so much.

#1999494 Would you bang, yes or no?

Posted by Epistaxis on 14 November 2012 - 12:02 PM

Posted Image

#1984684 Women Huddlers, Is There an Age...

Posted by Epistaxis on 06 November 2012 - 03:32 PM

And to this point, it's not so much about validation. Or maybe it is in the sense that it happened so much from 16-25 or so, that when it suddenly isn't happening anymore, it makes you question yourself.

Women are almost as stupid as men in that age range.

As we age, most of us mature enough to keep random musings about looks to ourselves.

Between 16-25, verbal diarrhea is endemic. You have entered a new demographic.

Congratulations, you also will find you can no longer beat everydamnbody in the gym off the dribble, you can't drink way too much and wake up feeling ok the next day, and you actually will give a second thought to risky behaviors.

Your AARP card is in the mail.

#1982750 If you vote straight ticket. That should be instaban from the Huddle.

Posted by Epistaxis on 05 November 2012 - 03:46 PM

Well hell.
If having kids doesn't require intelligence, forethought, planning, and careful deliberation...why the hell should we expect voting to be held to a higher standard?

Vote for whomever the hell you want, straight ticket, mix-n-match, or libertarian cool guy I'm-smarter-than-you (like I will)....whatever.

Just glad people vote.

#1974916 Best vacation you ever took?

Posted by Epistaxis on 01 November 2012 - 11:20 AM

I have been to Europe, all over the US including Hawaii, and assorted islands, Mexico, etc.

#1 Korea. There is nothing like seeing a place on the other side of the globe. Different culture but enough familiar stuff and English speakers to make it easier.

#2 Costa Rica. You get beach if you want it, and the cloud forest is something to behold.

Still on my list...Turkey, Egypt, and Australia/NZ.

#1959033 I Am Guarenteeing a Win Against Chicago

Posted by Epistaxis on 23 October 2012 - 08:48 AM

As a Bears fan, I'm obviously rather biased.

I don't see the Bears beating the hell out of Carolina.

I think the Bears will win, but I expect it to be very close.

The Panthers, in my limited opportunities to watch them play, appear to be a team that can't find a way to close out an opponent.
A way to make that play that just ENDS the game. A deflating sack, interception, a big stop on 3rd or 4th down...whatever.

The opposition seems to have a chance, and they seem to make the most of those opportunities this year.

This is a very opportunistic Bears defense, which is why I'm predicting a Bears victory...but to be clear, not by much.

I am not chalking this one up as easy. Not by a long shot, and I expect the Panthers to cover the spread, which I expect to be much larger than reality. So I would actually take the Panthers and the points, if I still made investment opportunities in sports wagering.

#1941110 Army Shows Kids How to Load Guns

Posted by Epistaxis on 09 October 2012 - 01:12 PM

It always makes me laugh how scared of weapons the euros are when compared to Americans.

Teach safety, remove the forbidden fruit aspect, all good.

Also having difficulty with the A-Stan reference.

So teaching kids about weapons=they go off and "fight for an oil company" and lose "their legs or genitals".

Yeah, this guy is a douche.

#1932691 Halloween Costumes

Posted by Epistaxis on 03 October 2012 - 12:45 PM

I'm going to be YouPorn.

Think this:
Posted Image

but lower with more suggestive text. Some girl will get drunk enough to think its a good idea.

You should actually just steal his idea, it is better.

#1931183 MNF: Bears @ Cowboys...

Posted by Epistaxis on 02 October 2012 - 10:20 AM

Yeah, because this stuff doesn't happen on EVERY sideline in every game.

Gimme a break.

Jay is under the microscope.

Whatever, bye cowpokes. I enjoyed that beatdown immensely.

#1922470 so uh im having a kid

Posted by Epistaxis on 27 September 2012 - 03:37 PM

gratz man

Our OB is a friend, so she let me deliver our first.

Didn't get the honor for #2, since he decided to get hung up on the cord.

He got the suction cup treatment on his melon, and the monitors going off had to be silenced...since both mom and dad knew exactly what the hell was going on. Since we were at HER hospital, you get the idea...the whole damn place was in our room.
I think they even mobilized the friggin chopper.

All ended up fine, but I had to have a seat.

I have seen some really jacked up crap in my time, but nothing quite gets to you like worrying about your own.

For now....

enjoy some of your last completely worry-free sleeps, once you have kids, you never sleep the same.
It is like always being on watch.

enjoy doing whatever the hell you feel like doing, whenever the hell you feel like doing it, because like it or not, your priorities better damn well change.

baby/toddler proof your homestead NOW, because that one is NOT best left for trial and error.

enjoy the most frustrating AND enjoyable AND inportant job you'll ever have, being a dad.

congrats again

#1922358 Fraternity suspended for alcohol enemas

Posted by Epistaxis on 27 September 2012 - 02:07 PM

should I google that?


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