Bullying in schools

[lightsout]

I was bullied once as a teen, I had enough and went bat poo crazy on the other person. My retaliation was enough to get me kicked out for the rest of the school year and they pressed charges. I ended up having to go through about 2 years of punishment for it. House arrest, community service, probation, etc... I was never bullied again, not ever, by anyone and neither were my friends just as long as they were hanging out with me.

There is a difference in bullying and just teasing someone.

Right. There is a difference. But it truly is a thin line for some people. Bullying to me is when there are threats (ie, "i'll kick your ass!" or "i'll slap the poo out of you!") or something physical (even a shove into a locker, onto the floor, etc.). Very few people are ever "bullied" because most people don't want to throw the first punch because they have no reason to other than pride, and even then, its not likely. Teasing can be harmful if you raised somebody to be soft (no offense meant to anybody here, btw). Kids who just want to be nice and in return, have other people be nice to them, usually get teased for whatever messed up reason. I think it was dockery earlier who said it, use big words and make them sound/look stupid, they will back down or hit you. Either way, you win.

[sunbunny]

IMO, teasing is just another word for bullying. Words hurt kids just as much as a punch. It's easy for an adult to say don't let it bother you, but kids are different.

I don't consider a kid who's nice to everyone to be soft; I consider them to be raised correctly. It's a shame when good kids have to completely change just to make it through school.

Ty, I think, came out stronger from the experience. I still wish he'd never had to face the hurt and torment he went through.

Oh, and girls are much worse than boys when it comes to teasing and bullying. They'll turn on a friend in second and make the kids life a living hell. My daughter went through a bad best friend break up. I didn't know if she'd come out intact or not. Now, they're back to being friends, although my daughter isn't allowed to see her, just talk on the phone with her.

[lightsout]

IMO, teasing is just another word for bullying. Words hurt kids just as much as a punch. It's easy for an adult to say don't let it bother you, but kids are different.

I don't consider a kid who's nice to everyone to be soft; I consider them to be raised correctly. It's a shame when good kids have to completely change just to make it through school.

Ty, I think, came out stronger from the experience. I still wish he'd never had to face the hurt and torment he went through.

Oh, and girls are much worse than boys when it comes to teasing and bullying. They'll turn on a friend in second and make the kids life a living hell. My daughter went through a bad best friend break up. I didn't know if she'd come out intact or not. Now, they're back to being friends, although my daughter isn't allowed to see her, just talk on the phone with her.

Probably didn't choose the best wording when I said "soft". I'm just saying, kids who are looked at as easy targets because they don't seem to pose much of a threat will get teased/bullied 9 times out of 10. Speaking from personal experience. I agree, it is a shame when good kids have to do things against their own moral code and what they have been taught just to be accepted by their peers. All that ends towards your senior year of high school when most people start to become less of an a-hole towards their peers.

[Kettle]

all of 7th grade and 9th grade gym were hell for me. both instances I had 4 to 5 guys ganging up on me. bullying isn't something to be taken lightly. school is to learn and prepare for life ahead. if it is a dreaded experience on a daily basis then what? kids likely become introvert if they aren't already and seclude themselves from what should be a mostly joyful experience. the isolation will lead them into thoughts of how to solve their problems, and then you get extreme incidents in some cases. homicides, suicides, accidental overdoses, etc. parents need to see that their kids can defend themselves when necessary, but more importantly the kids need to be taught to have respect for others and not provoke them to do so.

[sunbunny]

all of 7th grade and 9th grade gym were hell for me. both instances I had 4 to 5 guys ganging up on me. bullying isn't something to be taken lightly. school is to learn and prepare for life ahead. if it is a dreaded experience on a daily basis then what? kids likely become introvert if they aren't already and seclude themselves from what should be a mostly joyful experience. the isolation will lead them into thoughts of how to solve their problems, and then you get extreme incidents in some cases. homicides, suicides, accidental overdoses, etc. parents need to see that their kids can defend themselves when necessary, but more importantly the kids need to be taught to have respect for others and not provoke them to do so.

You nailed the problem in just those few words. I think it's actually harder to raise a kid to respect others feelings than it is to raise them to think only about themselves.

Tyler's personality changed, not going to lie. His everything pretty much changed; looks, clothes, etc.

[Kettle]

basically the golden rule there sunbunny. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I learned it at an early age being brought in a southern baptist family. i don't attend church anymore, but the teachings of how to be a good person stuck.

[Wither]

You can talk yourself out of most situations, but there are some idiots who like to shove around the smaller kids. It really just depends on the area. I never saw much bullying myself, but I was picked on a lot in like, 9th grade. After that, I got too big and good at football for them to do anything. Small, rural areas and real big cities typically have the most poo heads. Any place in the middle, for whatever reason, has no real problems. At least from people I've talked to about their high school/middle school experience.

When it gets physical, the rules sort of bend depending on how severe the situation is. It is the schools responsibility to ensure that the students are safe both mentally and physically.

Bullies are usually looking for a certain response and when they don't get that response, sometimes they escalate and sometimes they give up.