What Is The Worst Excuse You Have Ever Heard For An Injury At Work?

[Darth Biscuit]

Not a bad excuse per se but a fuging weird ass story...

This is going to sound pretty unbelievable but I assure you it is quite true and the NC Industrial Commission has extensive records of it.

Many years ago I took a job as a 2^nd shift warehouse manager. I oversaw the loading of trucks for the next days deliveries. About 4 months in I get summoned to the owner’s office when I arrived for my evenings work. I go in to find him 2 lawyers and a very large woman - easily 350lbs.

I was informed that this woman was one of my employees who was returning from medical leave. She was to be given a job immediately and I had no say in the matter. Apparently she had been “injured” on the job a couple months before I had arrived and had been out collecting disability.

The next day I was given access to the files. It turns out that her injury was from breaking the toilet in the ladies room. She had sat down and somehow the toilet collapsed and she fell taking out the stall partition.

Sounds completely like a "work related" injury... ;)

WTF did you do with her? Oh, and BTW, completely believe it... a girl that worked for me at a previous company was out for 2 months, was given extra vacation time and paid leave, and still sued the company because she claimed that she got a cut at the office and got a "flesh eating virus"...

How do you even respond to that???

[Inimicus]

Sounds completely like a "work related" injury... ;)

WTF did you do with her? Oh, and BTW, completely believe it... a girl that worked for me at a previous company was out for 2 months, was given extra vacation time and paid leave, and still sued the company because she claimed that she got a cut at the office and got a "flesh eating virus"...

How do you even respond to that???

She returned with a bunch of bullshit special requirements (extra breaks, desk job, etc) and proceeded to be a massive disruption.

I basically made her quit because I wouldnt let her go to the bathroom without an someone going with her "in case she fell again". She suffered through that for a couple of weeks before she no-showed a shift and I poo canned her.

Flesh eating virus? Thats a good one.

[Darth Biscuit]

She returned with a bunch of bullshit special requirements (extra breaks, desk job, etc) and proceeded to be a massive disruption.

I basically made her quit because I wouldnt let her go to the bathroom without an someone going with her "in case she fell again". She suffered through that for a couple of weeks before she no-showed a shift and I poo canned her.

Flesh eating virus? Thats a good one.

Some people just want a free ride if they can get it... fug that. Work hard, and if you have some special issues, I'll help you out... come in and expect to do nothing and get paid, gtfo. Good job on that.

[Guest]

We had a ditzy blonde receptionist who held on to her job only because a manager wanted to bang her. All the other women and most of the guys hated her because she was totally useless. One day she "hurt her finger", one finger, and just sat there, claiming this one hurt finger was preventing her working at all, even from answering the phone. She sat there with her hand and finger elevated for about an hour or so before the manager finally balled up and fired her.

[Floppin]

We had a methadone addict working construction for my dads company once. He laid a piece of plywood across his lap to cut it with a skill-saw. He cut right through both his thighs and didn't realize it till he tried to stand up.

[CatofWar]

Hell I've had a bunch of wtf accident related stories, all true. From getting bit by a monkey to running full speed into a parked car. Somehow I missed the fuging car being there.

[Floppin]

I nailed three fingers together with a nail gun, I also got shot in the head with a nail by a guy working above me. It bounced off luckily. I shot myself in the chest with a ringshank nail. It stuck into my sternum and I just pulled it out straight away as a reaction. My chest felt like I got kicked by a horse for about two weeks.

[CatofWar]

Holy fug your luck is worse than mine.

[Floppin]

You have no idea.

[CatofWar]

Dude I've fallen out of parked 757s, had a malinios bite through a sleeve like butter, you name it. Haven't shot myself with anything other than an errant load.

[mmmbeans]

Dude I've fallen out of parked 757s, had a malinios bite through a sleeve like butter, you name it. Haven't shot myself with anything other than an errant load.

you gotta watch where you're aiming that thing man...if it gets in your eye that shiat stings.

i'm not sure it's covered by worker's comp either.

[Kevin Greene]

you gotta watch where you're aiming that thing man...if it gets in your eye that shiat stings.

i'm not sure it's covered by worker's comp either.

TMI Bro.