Redskins Ask Haynesworth To Gain 2,400 Pounds

[ChucktownK]

http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/redskins_ask_albert

WASHINGTON—Redskins coach Jim Zorn reportedly asked new defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth to begin bulking up Monday, claiming that by adding 2,400 pounds to his frame the All-Pro could improve his run-stuffing ability by single-handedly filling every gap on the defensive line. "Albert could be a dominant force if he just put on a couple thousand pounds," Zorn said of the two-time Pro Bowler, who signed a seven-year, $100 million contract with the team last week. "If he adds some mass to his shoulders, neck, and chest, and especially along his sides and the ends of his arms, there's not an offensive line in the league that will be able to move him, not even with help from a tight end." According to Redskins trainers, Haynesworth has been placed on a strict diet consisting of grilled chicken breasts, a green salad, and a giant barrel of lard at every meal.

[KillerKat]

This isn't the UK!

[Its The Milk]

That was hilarious :smilielol5:

[stevesmith3428]

Omg are the redskins stupid!?!?!?!/!?!?!/

he will probably die

poor guy

[The Link]

Why don't they just put a uniform on a Black Rhino and train it to play D-line?

[ChucktownK]

Why don't they just put a uniform on a Black Rhino and train it to play D-line?

They don't need to train them, they already stomp on heads.

[mmmbeans]

Omg are the redskins stupid!?!?!?!/!?!?!/

he will probably die

poor guy

yes. he probably will.

:leaving:

[CharlotteBeer.com]

They don't need to train them, they already stomp on heads.

Well played.