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Hollis Thomas wants to try out over phone


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MIAMI—According to his teammates and coaches, Colts quarterback Peyton Manning has been sequestered in the film room at Sun Life Stadium for the last three days reviewing game tape from the Saints' 1974 season. "Can't be too prepared," a bleary-eyed Manning reportedly told a team manager, adding that if the Saints decide to sign former middle linebacker Joe Federspiel, 60, before the game this Sunday, he'll know exactly what adjustments to make. "Could you get me that Rams game from November? I need to see how quick [former strong safety] Johnny Fuller got to the quarterback on the blitz. Go now." Manning later told the Colts defense that they didn't need to watch any of the game film, as the Saints' quarterback in 1974 was "absolutely terrible."

rofl, I need to make theonion my homepage

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CHARLOTTE, NC—Claiming that he felt "rushed," Panthers quarterback Jake Delhomme failed to connect on a 5-foot pass to his Capital Grille restaurant valet Sunday, instead sending his car keys into the hands of the wrong parking attendant. "It's frustrating, because I knew as soon as I let go of the keys that the throw was off target," said Delhomme, adding that he should not have been throwing off his back foot. "I don't want to make excuses, but I may have injured my throwing hand on the sharp edge of a key while I was in the pocket. Hopefully, I can watch film from the valet's security camera and correct that next time." Once inside the restaurant, Delhomme fumbled a steaming hot dinner roll, kicked it across the dining room while trying to pick it up, and was blocked into a side table by a busboy, who eventually recovered the baked good.
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    • They can get film of all the games? Every team? Wow! Who knew… Our games with them are big examples of why they are in  the CB market so hard.   It is the study they do getting ready for the games.  Preparing to play against is a little different than just analyzing film in scout mode. Deeper dive. Then you are analyzing post game too.  This goes to why players often change teams but stay in the division. The opponents know each other on a higher level.  Plus if you lost to us, you used to get fired. Now you have to trade your first round pick. Moving up on the world. 
    • I honestly can’t believe this team’s turnaround this season. It’s surreal. Figured healthy we’d be fringe playoffs and with another lottery pick could finally turn the corner, but we don’t even need that. This group is ready. We haven’t played remotely well the last 5 games and yet still blew out 5 bad teams by 16+ each game like it was casual practice. We had a few solid teams with Kemba and Big Al but this is easily our best group since the original Hornets moved to NO. Man, what a shift in culture this new ownership group and front office has brought. So damn happy to see it after years of suffering and consistently meaningless games in this stretch of previous seasons.   Only 2.5 games out of the 6 seed, although Miami, Atlanta and Orlando have been playing well too. Gonna be a fun final stretch, hopefully we can get a top 8 seed at the very least. Celtics tomorrow will be a good test. Would be huge to keep the road winning streak up against a very hot top team on the 2nd half of a back to back. We’ve played Boston pretty well the last few years with much of this same group despite sucking so I do feel pretty good about it. Kon is due for a huge game coming off a few cold shooting games (although despite the poor shooting he’s been contributing well with defense, assists and rebounds).
    • It amazes me how underrated Horn has become after he finally was able to stay on the field. Sure last year wasn’t perfect but he was still a huge reason for our rebound defensively and I’d say he’s easily a top 10 corner. You don’t want to see Mike Jackson as our top corner. Any player is available for the right price but I’d be extremely hesitant to move Horn even for a big haul from LA. 
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