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Huddle Celebrity Roast thread: Saltman

Matt Foley

By Matt Foley,
in Huddle Lounge

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Jangler Newbie

Jangler

Posted
Posted

One time when Salty was visiting NYC he decided to take a walk in Central Park. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl" Salty says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" – the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!" – says Salty. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am Pakistani!" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.

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Captroop Grand Master

Captroop

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We are here to celebrate the life and work of Saltman; a man who's responsible for more derailings than text-messaging Metro-rail drivers. Seriously, Salty, your posts are about as clever as g5jamz is potent. Everything you touch turns to shiz. Atlanta was like Savanna until Saltman moved there.

He's got an unfathomable amount of rep. When it comes to rep, Salt's a bigger ***** than Obama's former lover; SouthCak, I think was his name.

Salty is well known for his love of ass. This taste was actually something he developed over time. He is used to seeing women's backsides because they can't stand looking him in the face when he made love to them.

Saltman, you look like Freddy Kreuger with acne scars instead of burns.

But that doesn't matter. Salty has actually settled down with a great wife and has a beautiful child (congrats by the way), which means he is officially getting less ass than dpantherman.

But you've got to be careful with the rear entrance shenanigans. Use a rubber when you're playing in the back yard or you'll concieve a kid like Meat.

For those who don't know, Saltman is actually his second profile on the Huddle. His first profile was Sultan33g. He had to abandon that profile when it contracted Syphilis from one of NC Biscuit's avatars.

Biscuit, for those who don't know developed his love of breasts examining Panthro's chest. Biscuit you've got worse taste in women than P-Paw and his "I want permission to cheat on you" girlfriend.

In all seriousness Saltman, we love you, I love you. Keep doing what you do, because the Huddle wouldn't be the same without you. Good night!

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C47 Newbie

C47

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We are here to celebrate the life and work of Saltman; a man who's responsible for more derailings than text-messaging Metro-rail drivers. Seriously, Salty, your posts are about as clever as g5jamz is potent. Everything you touch turns to shiz. Atlanta was like Savanna until Saltman moved there.

He's got an unfathomable amount of rep. When it comes to rep, Salt's a bigger ***** than Obama's former lover; SouthCak, I think was his name.

Salty is well known for his love of ass. This taste was actually something he developed over time. He is used to seeing women's backsides because they can't stand looking him in the face when he made love to them.

Saltman, you look like Freddy Kreuger with acne scars instead of burns.

But that doesn't matter. Salty has actually settled down with a great wife and has a beautiful child (congrats by the way), which means he is officially getting less ass than dpantherman.

But you've got to be careful with the rear entrance shenanigans. Use a rubber when you're playing in the back yard or you'll concieve a kid like Meat.

For those who don't know, Saltman is actually his second profile on the Huddle. His first profile was Sultan33g. He had to abandon that profile when it contracted Syphilis from one of NC Biscuit's avatars.

Biscuit, for those who don't know developed his love of breasts examining Panthro's chest. Biscuit you've got worse taste in women than P-Paw and his "I want permission to cheat on you" girlfriend.

In all seriousness Saltman, we love you, I love you. Keep doing what you do, because the Huddle wouldn't be the same without you. Good night!

Good god you watch too much comedy central :D....

The only thing missing from that was the Lisa Lampanelli vagina joke....

lisa_lampanelli.jpg

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