Jump to content
  • Welcome!

    Register and log in easily with Twitter or Google accounts!

    Or simply create a new Huddle account. 

    Members receive fewer ads , access our dark theme, and the ability to join the discussion!

     

Halloween Costumes


hepcat

Recommended Posts

Know what you're being yet?

We've got a thing going at work between departments for a contest. Grand prize $100. There are 6 of us in my group, 3 women & 3 men...ideas so far:

-Wizard of Oz

-Characters from Sesame Street

-Gilligans Island

-The Munsters or Adams Family

I dunno, I kinda just wanna do something awesome solo and win the $100 instead of only win less than $20.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

07.jpg

Zack: This is the sort of thing I have nightmares about. Hair covered bananas singing Jailhouse Rock. I should probably talk to a therapist about those.

Dr. Thorpe: I have nightmares about being stuck in a horrible costume and falling down and not being able to get up. People make a big deal about Halloween safety for kids, but what about adults? Somebody is going to get drunk in this thing and fall down, and he'll be as helpless as a flipped tortoise.

Zack: It's so horrible it makes me want to buy fifty of them and then get groups of people to stand in darkened alleyways downtown. Like you walk past the alley and you see five of these guys standing around a burning oil drum. You'll keep walking, but you'll never forget what you saw.

Dr. Thorpe: It would be like that part in The Shining where the guy in the dog costume is going down on the old man. There's nothing objectively scary about it, but it's just fuged up enough that it chills your blood.

Zack: Yeah, it is EXACTLY like that. Like you just caught a glimpse of something terrible, but you're not exactly sure why it's so terrible. Some horrible other reality that you had never noticed, but one night walking alone in downtown Chicago you saw them. You saw five sneering hair bananas standing around a burning oil drum.

Dr. Thorpe: I think that in certain circumstances, this costume really demonstrates the true spirit of Halloween.

Zack: Yeah, it transcends its intended purpose.

Dr. Thorpe: I think I'll go ahead and order a few of these. I'll have to wait a few months to wear them, though. Doing it on Halloween wouldn't be disturbing enough. Because there might be a hint of an explanation for that.

Zack: You can't wear them in broad daylight either. You have to like emerge from a sewer wearing one or step out of a stall in a public restroom at some distant forgotten rest stop.

Dr. Thorpe: It might help to modify them so they didn't look like Elvis, too. You could make horrible old man faces for them, and get the clothing all ripped and dirty.

Zack: Maybe you could pry off the sunglasses and put those horrible wide blue leprechaun eyes on it.

Dr. Thorpe: Whoa, slow down, you want people to get scared, but you don't want to trigger the primordial "must kill it" instinct.

Zack: I think possibly the coolest prank would be to put up an ad on monster.com for some amazing job. Like a corporate vice president, seven figure salary, and then give an address for the applicants to come to. The address is like an old abandoned molasses factory and then you just cram it full of people wearing this costume. So when they open the door they are confronted with 20-30 of these. No desks or office equipment, just these guys standing around a molasses stained factory.

Dr. Thorpe: And maybe you could get twenty or thirty old tape recorders with tapes of babies crying and hide them all around the place, playing baby screams at full volume.

Zack: Yeah, and in the run up to the interview all correspondence should be via email and it should all have some weird foreign diction. Like they'll think you're Chinese or something. Then they realize that the whole company is just a bunch of these. We should totally have our own TV show. You know that.

Dr. Thorpe: Definitely. Also, there should be a big pink banner that says "WELCOME TO THE NEW DEATH" or something. Or maybe just "PROBLEM."

Zack: With a question mark, and there should be some really tinny music playing, like some old 1920s big band music on a record player

Dr. Thorpe: ¿PROBLEM?

Zack: When they first open the door all of these guys are just kind of shuffling around. They're all doing things that people do, but not quite. Like moving a broom awkwardly or just holding a telephone receiver that's not connected to anything.

Dr. Thorpe: And when they see the guy come in they all just stop and stare and start wordlessly vocalizing in monotone.

Zack: Yeah, like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" or something. You could have framed employee of the month pictures by the entrance and they could all just be like turn of the century family portraits.

Dr. Thorpe: The kind with posthumous baby shots.

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/fashion-swat/halloween-swat.php?page=7

Fashion SWAT. My favorite part of Halloween.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


  • PMH4OWPW7JD2TDGWZKTOYL2T3E.jpg

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • It wasn’t completely his fault, but outside of two throws and one or two scrambles he didn’t do much to help. His accuracy was all over the place, numerous passes that were placed poorly and didn’t give the receiver a good chance to catch the ball or do anything with it after. He also continues to display terrible pocket awareness. Even the sacks could have been avoided, they weren’t immediate like the pressure we got on Shough at times. Bryce just often has no feel for pressure and stands there waiting to get sacked after numerous seconds have passed. 
    • I really fuging hate this era in so many ways.  I look at those Adin Ross and Neon kids, and I just wonder why tf are they famous?  Why would anyone be desperate enough to gain THAT audience that they’d risk money, career, disciplinary action to go up there and associate with those fuging dweebs?  And back in my day, racist peers got their ass beat.  And not endorsing or approving bully culture, but checks and balances and all…  had those two been bullied, or at the very least humbled, they wouldn’t be famous and glorified for being the fuging idiots they are now.  It seriously pisses me off… they both have done and said multiple, openly racist stuff and major media keeps pushing them, talking about them, and propping them up… and then dummies like Puka who don’t need the platform or exposure lend their celebrity to them.  fuging idiot… and even the other streamers, I don’t get - Speed, Kai…  I don’t understand making nobodies famous at all, but there is at least entertainment value to some degree there, and I could see how young, impressionable kids would find them something to aspire to (sadly), or view as “cool.”  But Ross and Neon?  They’re just shitty, shitty nerds with big ass mouths. I’ve went back recently and watched some classics (in two very different eras and categories 😂)  like Robocop and Idiocracy.  And what I find fascinating is how both movies illustrate how stupid society became by showing what the citizenry is entertained by.  In both, society became anti-intellectual and the citizenry were entertained by lowest denominator, primal-type absurdity - poo like, “Ouch! My Balls!”  Or on Robocop, a guy is a watching a show where they are smashing cakes on ladies’ breasts and then a guy says a line as the camera zooms in like, “I’d buy that for a dollar!” and the audience thinks it’s hilarious.  That’s where I feel like we are now.  Like who watches that clip with Puka and thinks any of that poo is funny or cool?  If I was Puka, I’d honestly be wondering why tf I’m hanging out with these beta ass, racist, cretin ass weirdos.
    • 7 wins this year and some of those against really good teams and yall think Canales might get fired? Lol Good luck getting a better coach in here if that happens.  
×
×
  • Create New...