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Falcons looking to name butt shaped stadium

SCP

By SCP,
in Carolina Panthers

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SCP Enthusiast

SCP

Posted
Posted

I hear sponsors are lining up for stadium naming rights. Apparently it's down to a bidding war between Preparation H, Exlax, and Astroglide. Either way is a win. The give away items are gonna be awesome for the inaugural season. First 10,000 fans in the gate get free:

Game 1 - Matt Ryan Anal Beads

Game 2 - Falcon logo enema kit

Game 3 - Julio Jones 2-ply shitpaper

Game 4 - Roddy White Butt Plug

Game 5 - Sam Baker Exlax

Game 6 - Mike Smith Hemroid Pads and donut seat

Game 7 - Arthur Blank Fisting Doll

Game 8 - Steven Jackson KY Jelly Collector Applicator Tube

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TbTeRRoR Rookie

TbTeRRoR

Posted
Posted

Then they can host the 1st annual Goatse.com Bowl for college football

I was about to say it looks like goatse...........someone should photo shop some hands in there......... btw  I do not  recommmend googling goatse ... just dont have a full stomach if your weak like that if you do... ugh

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L-TownCat Grand Master

L-TownCat

Posted
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Any name for this stadium must include at least one or all of the following:

1: Brown Balloon Knot

2: Chocolate Star Fish

3: Big Round Brown Eye

4: Booty Blow Hole

5: Matt Ryan's Favorite Vagina

Sponsors should include those listed in the OP.

One addition to the sponsor list should be butt-ease.

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G spot Newbie

G spot

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ive heard from my source they may make every seat in the stadium a toliet with little "oh poo grips" on the back.  

 

you see people squinting, holding on for dear life and open air wiping throughout the game with the beer guy selling tp rolls and baby wipes up and down the isles.

 

buy 1 get 1 deal when Matty Rice sh!ts his pants

 

 

 

edit:  that frees up the traditional bathrooms for pregame/postgame/halftime stalls with glory holes and rocking chairs in them, they do have to rent pads for said stall.  if not, they are kneeling on tile and sitting on hard wood rocking chairs. i couldnt imagine sitting on them with those assless chaps the falcon fans always wear.

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Cary Kollins Experienced

Cary Kollins

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Rick Reilly is reporting the Falcons will implement a lenient drinking policy which will enable Falcon fans to enjoy their preferred method of alcohol consumption, the butt chug, right from their stadium seats.

Reilly, an avid butt chugger, has reportedly bought season tickets.

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