TNPanther

If Canales had any balls he’d bring out the red rifle for the second half

Darnold will fall back to earth this year again after 3 games of setting the world on fire... you watch. This goes back to his college days. Dude performs well when there's no pressure. Under the spotlight, he folds.

Checks out. Tepper has wrecked our franchise in similar fashion to how the terrorists wrecked the towers on that fateful day.

Man, that program is about to implode in an unprecedented way. Rumor has it that Deion made the entire team run gassers while he told his sons and Hunter to go rest in the locker room. The circus happening there makes our situation look tame in comparison.

The Golden Calf of Bristol comes to mind for me. He was a lot like Bryce in that he didn't have an NFL arm and his pocket awareness was next to nothing. Had the physical tools as a runner but failed to utilize them. Kyler Murray would also likely be a bust if he didn't possess elite running ability. Bryce is essentially Kyler without the arm or the legs.

I expected to lose but show some improvement year-over-year. Not only do they look significantly worse schematically and physically, but players who were studs last year (e.g., Brown, Horn when healthy) look like they simply don't care. I was mainly anticipating Bryce to look like he did in the preseason against the Bills, but man, he's awful. At this point all we can do is laugh at them and enjoy the shitshow. ETA: I really hope we trade Thielen to a contender, dude deserves it. He is one of very few putting his heart into this poo show of a team.

I'm in the minority here but I actually really enjoy listening to Tony Romo. I've tuned into games on CBS in which I don't have a dog in the fight because of him. On the contrary, I've avoided watching MNF in the past specifically because of Joe Tessitore.

Brady will draw in the views on his name alone. I think he will be terribly boring. Fox's broadcasting quality has really overall declined lately.

RB's these days are a dime a dozen. They're like pit bulls at an animal shelter. Go out and get another one.

Not trading this overrated spinderella for 2 first round picks was arguably the 2nd worst move any GM has ever made this decade. The first was also made by the same person.

Chark, Ian Thomas, and Marshall for sure.

I forgot to add: DJ Chark is a VW Golf GTI with a failing clutch master cylinder - he's unreliable, but fast and effective when he gets going, but that's IF he gets going. Frank Reich was a 2008 Mercedes C Class- tired, decrepit, somewhat effective in its day 10 ish years ago, but mainly made its name off of its peers and now resides in the junkyard after 5 different owners. Stephon Gilmore was a very nice used rental car from Turo.

I'd liken Bryce to a Nissan Versa - tiny, no power, no exceptional features, somewhat nimble but not great, and gets blown around by a gust of wind. Somehow, its owner got swindled into trading 3 other new cars for it straight-up. Tepper is a late-2000's Subaru Impreza - an asshole car that constantly blows a gasket and may spew fluids at you. Scott Fitterer is a Chevy Traverse with a blown engine - a bloated pig that is utterly useless. Brian Burns is a current-generation Toyota Supra - extremely overrated by amateurs, thinks it's worth more than it is, not truly the brand it's advertised to be, but still has speed on the edge. Derrick Brown is a Toyota 4Runner - rock solid, reliable, brute force to be reckoned with. Miles Sanders is a current-gen Ford Bronco - severly overpaid for by its current owners, performs like poo, but looks good in its uniform. Adam Thielen is 250,000-mile plus Honda Civic SI - reliable, quick, nimble, fun to watch, but only has a few more years on the road and on its 2nd owner. Jaycee Horn is a Jaguar of any year or model - performs well when active, but sits in the shop for most of its life. Finally, Ickey is a Challenger Hellcat - can match opponents in a power-against-power contest, but those with good handling will run circles around it. I'm a car nerd.