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Arizona is now ON NOTICE!

Zod

By Zod,
in Carolina Panthers

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Zod Grand Master

Zod

Posted
Posted

Listen up Arizona! You are now ON NOTICE!

This week the Carolina Panthers play in Northern Mexico against a team that can think of nothing more menacing than a little red bird to represent their team. A place where pasty white home owners water their rock gardens while pretending to be anything but the walking maxi pads in plaid shorts we all know them to be. A place where the only thing more common than losing is sand.

Welcome to Arizona! We make Utah look exciting.

Wait, whats that? Feel that cool breeze? A mysterious change is in the air.

Winning is coming.

The old regime is gone. A new leader has emerged and is cleaning house. Gone are the days of the 3rd and long draw play. There will be no more sitting on the laurels of a 3 point lead, desperately trying to run out the clock. Our new leader is a true warrior, a military man, a fighter.

i-jq8vpVL-M.jpg

Winning is coming.

Featured in this new army is a young upstart, full of potential and the pedigree to be a great leader. A fighter in his own right, he is known as the Happy Warrior, as he appears to be smiling in even the most dire of situations.

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Winning is coming

This new Panthers squad features a warrior the likes of which Panthers fans have rarely witnessed. He escaped the wintery lard clogged wasteland known as Chicago and has found his salvation here in the Old God's country. Place him on the battle field and watch as all that oppose him collectively crap themselves. Ironically, crapping themselves would be the most entertaining thing the Cardinals are capable of.

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That is right, this week the Carolina Panthers will begin to raise the hopes and dreams of all their fans. This week they will rise above the negativity and put the rest of the league on notice. This week they will do what last season could not be done.

Winning is coming.

Panthers 24 Cardinals 21

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