How not to apply for a job

[Mr. Scot]

Stories from HR professionals compiled by Reader's Digest...

 

We ask prospective job applicants at our business to fill out a questionnaire. For the line 'Choose one word to summarize your strongest professional attribute,' one woman wrote, "I'm very good at following instructions."

 

A guy once talked during the interview about how an affair cost him a previous job.

 

I had somebody list their prison time as a job. And an exotic dancer who called herself a 'customer service representative.'

 

Candidate specified that his availability was limited because Friday, Saturday, and Sunday was 'drinking time.'

 

A guy who forgot dark socks to wear with his suit colored in his ankles with a black felt-tip marker.

 

I was interviewing someone who took a cell-phone call and asked me to leave my office while they talked.

 

The candidate told the interviewer he was fired from his last job for beating up his boss.

 

The candidate said that by crossing the Maryland state line he was in violation of his probation but felt the interview was worth risking possible jail time.

 

An applicant said she was a ‘people person,’ not a ‘numbers person,’ in her interview for an accounting position.

 

A candidate complained that she was hot. She then said ‘Excuse me’ and removed her socks. After placing them on the desk, she continued as if everything was normal.

 

Full List: http://www.rd.com/slideshows/funny-interviews/

[PhillyB]

is wearing a panthers polo in there?

[Mr. Scot]

is wearing a panthers polo in there?

 

No, but walking into the interview with a bird on your shoulder is.

 

 

(wasn't me, I swear)

 

[stirs]

I had a guy tell me once that he was not late, but that he just didn't leave home soon enough to get there on time.

[Darth Biscuit]

OK, but the stripper was technically correct.

[PandaPancake]

OK, but the stripper was technically correct.

The best kind of correct

[TheAmericanDream]

Are people really this dumb? Hard to believe.

[Mr. Scot]

Are people really this dumb? Hard to believe.

 

If you've ever worked with the general public, it's honestly not that hard to believe at all

 

[thefuzz]

If you've ever worked with the general public, it's honestly not that hard to believe at all

 

 

Agreed.

 

The more I work with the public, the more nervous I get about the direction of this country.

 

Hopefully, stupid is everywhere in the World.

[Mr. Scot]

Nothing will destroy your faith in the educational system like working with the public.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(except maybe going to a Saints game)

[cardiackat88.]

is wearing a panthers polo in there?

The thread is how NOT to apply, kplzthnx.

[Porn Shop Clerk]

this is how people behave when they think they have a right to employment 

[Herbert The Love Bug]

I don't see anything wrong with any of these

[natty]

When hunting for my next job I'm using this answer if I get asked, mostly because it's a BS question.

 

"What would you say is your greatest weakness"

 

"I'm too honest"

 

"I don't think that's a weakness"

 

"I don't give a poo what you think"