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Rules that guys wish girls knew...

Shufdog

By Shufdog,
in Huddle Lounge

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Shufdog Community Regular

Shufdog

Posted
Posted

Let me tell you, these are all true.

Women, pay attention, especially to #1.

1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.

4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to; expect an answer you do not want to hear.

6. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and NASCAR.

8. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides....Let it be.

9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way.

10. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

11. Crying is blackmail.

12. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.

13. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

14. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

15. Most guys own three pairs of shoes -- tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

16. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

17. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is

what your girlfriends are for.

20. Check your oil. Please.

21. DO NOT fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.

23. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

24. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

25. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

26. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

27. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

28. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get

over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends like THEIR relationship is SO MUCH better.

29. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit,

not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what Mauve is.

30. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

31. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind- reading ability is not proof of

how little we care about you.

32. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothings wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

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Mrs Pantherfan Newbie

Mrs Pantherfan

Posted
Posted

That is the most assholish list I've ever seen...you think you're better than we are....are women your fuging servants?? Because if not, it sure as fug sounds like that's how you perceive us

If I wanna cut my hair, I'm gonna cut my f*cking hair..get the f*ck over it..you're not the one drying it, styling it and straightening it

# 8..I watch just as many sports as my husband does...so there

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Guest Irv

Guest Irv

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Posted · Hidden
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If we hear from an old girlfriend, we will briefly fantasize about having sex with her. But do not worry; the fantasy includes you AND her together

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Guest Irv

Guest Irv

Posted
Posted

That is the most assholish list I've ever seen...you think you're better than we are....are women your fuging servants?? Because if not, it sure as fug sounds like that's how you perceive us

If I wanna cut my hair, I'm gonna cut my f*cking hair..get the f*ck over it..you're not the one drying it, styling it and straightening it

# 8..I watch just as many sports as my husband does...so there

8008775f-1359-498b-ae6c-648af69f1078.jpg

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Mrs Pantherfan Newbie

Mrs Pantherfan

Posted
Posted

Haha out of all the stuff there it's the hair thats the biggest deal

And I think the point was - Don't ask us if you should cut your hair because the answer is no, we don't think you should.

I don't ask because he's not my boss...I do it because I want to

the reason this bugs me so much is b/c I have friends whose husbands are idiots like that...they would freak should they cut their hair...it's not ya'lls hair!!

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Darth Biscuit Mentor

Darth Biscuit

Posted
Posted

I don't ask because he's not my boss...I do it because I want to

the reason this bugs me so much is b/c I have friends whose husbands are idiots like that...they would freak should they cut their hair...it's not ya'lls hair!!

I agree that it's your hair but shouldn't we at least be able to have an opinion? I'm sure you would prefer that your husband not have a mullet...

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Darth Biscuit Mentor

Darth Biscuit

Posted
Posted

haha this is true..but I would say for the most part..the average wife or gf isn't going to cut it into a dyke cut and dye it blue over night...usually it's just a length thing (hee hee)

Some might... I generally prefer long hair as well... but it depends.

Always gotta go with the double entendres don't you... :ciappa:

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