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Deangelo Unleashed - Win this photo

Zod

By Zod,
in Carolina Panthers

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Zod Grand Master

Zod

Posted
Posted

In honor of his restructuring, I am giving way an exclusive print of this photo featuring Deangelo Williams...

 

deangelo-williams.jpg

Deangelo WIlliams

 

What do you need to do to win?

 

Make me laugh.

 

Post something in this topic that will make me literally laugh out loud.

 

I will mark the winner as "answered" tomorrow.

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Leeroy Jenkins PhD Newbie

Leeroy Jenkins PhD

Posted
Posted

Yes! bad joke time!  Here we go:

 

Mhatma Gandhi went barefoot most of the time, as you probably knew, which caused him to develop many very painful calluses all over his feet.  he also ate very little, which made him frail and gave him bad breath. All this together made him.... wait for it..... A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis!

 

I can come up with worse.....

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Leeroy Jenkins PhD Newbie

Leeroy Jenkins PhD

Posted
Posted

It's a warm summer day and an elderly gentleman and his wife are driving down the highway. They are in the midst of a heated argument; his wife has accused him of adultery. Although he is vigilantly defending his honor she is convinced that he has been cheating on her. Back and forth they shout, getting louder and angrier and more upset with each exchange. Eventually his wife's anger boils over and in a fit of rage she reaches over, pulls his penis out, slices it off and hurls it out the window of the speeding car.

Meanwhile, a middle-aged man is driving down the same highway with his six year old daughter. All of a sudden a bloody severed penis flies out of nowhere and SMACKS against the windshield, where it flops around for a few seconds before flying off to the side.

The young girl jumps forward in her seat, startled, and exclaims "Oh, my GOSH!!! Daddy, what was that?"

The father panics: his daughter is still too young and innocent to learn about such things as penises. He thinks quickly and tells her "Don't worry, sweetie. It was just a bug."

"Oh, okay Daddy" she responds, and they continue on their way. After a few minutes of silence the little girl looks up at her father and asks "Sure had a big dick, didn't it?"

 

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    • Rocky Davis
      RODS gotta GO

      By Rocky Davis · Posted

      Florida is the only team that would be doing that to us, and it happens when we are down Chatty, Walker isn't 100% and our top players are being molested in plain view on the ice. Florida is bigger and just as fast as we are, they have the two biggest agitating arseholes in the NHL in Marchand and Tkachuk, have a solid coach and a lot of nice pieces that make that team the best in the East by a good margin this year and possibly back to back Cup champions.  I fail to mention Zito who has been aggressive in getting Marchand and Seth Jones plus other players at the deadline to fill in any weaknesses. We have taken the long term, we have a shot every year approach and keep coming up short.  This is the summer to come away with the last needed pieces and if that takes sacrificing some prospects and picks we have to do it.  We have Freddie who is a very good goalie, but I still think young Kooch needs more time - he shows flashes but he still isn't right between the ears yet. This is definitely it for Orlov, not sure about Burns although he has looked it the last half of the season.  It would be nice to be able to get rid of KK somehow.  Svech has never become the guy I thought he'd be so a pure scorer would be nice.  I still like where this organization is EVEN with RBA coaching.  Do we discredit everything the guy has done in years where we weren't supposed to make the playoffs let alone win some series etc??  We need a bit more size, but I like we added Walker, Carrier, and Robinson who all had some good experience and didn't mind showing some grit.  Who's Back:    Forwards:  Aho, Svech, Jarvy, Blake, Hall, Carrier, Staal, Marty, Stankoven (need to sign to a bridge at least), KK  (really need to trade him this summer or next year for sure, his NMC kicks in 26-27) Defensemen:  Slavin, Walker, Chatty, Ghost, Nikishin, Morrow Goalies:  Freddy, Koochy Potential: Forwards:   Nadeau (he was like a -20 in Chicago so he'll have to really earn Rod's trust), Robidas, FUS didn't have a great season, Bring back Roslovic?, Jost for cheap?? Defensemen:  Technically Nikishin and Morrow, but I have them replacing Orlov and Burns above, Honka, Probably will sign one who plays good D and doesn't break the bank Goalies:  Khazheyev?, Sign one possibly?? tl;dr:  Bottom line is we are definitely going to need to sign a Defenseman or two, and 2-3 Forwards with 2 being scorers and hopefully taller than 6'0".  We have really good depth at forward, we are thinning out at D, and our goalies.....I am just not sure.
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      Jalen Ramsey

      By jfra78 · Posted

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