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Panthers release........

NanceUSMC

By NanceUSMC,
in Carolina Panthers

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NanceUSMC Newbie

NanceUSMC

Posted
Posted

Per the Charlotte Observer:

In a shocking turn of events, the Panthers have decided to eliminate all fans over 30. In a brief press conference, GM Marty Hurney stated "This was a tough decision, but the organization has decided to move in another direction with the fanbase." Choking back tears, Coach Fox stated simply, "It is what it is." The release of the 30+ fanbase caps a busy beginning to the Carolina offseason. It's unsure what fans they plan to bring in, if any, over the coming weeks via free agency. "There have been some fans released in Oakland and St Louis recently that we would like to bring in for visits, but nothing has been scheduled at this time", stated Hurney.

Reached via email for comment, former fan Zod responded to the move, "I like it. It was time to start over and let the young fans shine. It definitely adds some spice to my offseason." Longtime fan, Mr Scot, stated "I'm floored! I just never saw this coming." Early speculation could have the former fanbase being picked up by bandwagon clubs, such as Washington, Dallas or San Francisco.

Panther Kicker John Kasay tweeted, "Thank God I'm a Dolphins fan!"

Asked what he felt the front office's motivation behind the move is, veteran WR Steve Smith responded, "89! That's their motivation. 89 all day!"

It is still unclear at this point who the Panthers could be targeting with their first selection in the upcoming fandraft this April.

In related news, a man has been removed from the home of Panther Safety Chris Harris, according to police "for his own protection". More details as they are available.

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Fiz Newbie

Fiz

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Posted

Hooray for being under 30!!!

It's also a good move, money wise. Serving....

[ATTACH]32316[/ATTACH]

...to old folks is expensive. Bring on the...

[ATTACH]32317[/ATTACH]

(extra cheese on my nachos, please!)

oh great nothing but empty carbs, saturated fat, and IPA poo beer

i'll take the malbec tia

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