What is the lamest excuse you have ever heard for a divorce?

[Brokenbad]

I know a guy that told his wife, "I am the lead singer of a band, therefor it is contradictory for me to have a wife".

I don't know about the rest of you married guys, but my wife would have chopped my balls off for a stupid comment like this!

[Jangler]

"I'm in love with bronco's mom."

[SorthNarolina]

"I have gas".

[Hawk]

you ruined my life

oh...heard...I thought you asked what we used

[charlotte49er]

"You're Gay? don't you think that was something I needed to know these last 5 years?"

Wait, that wasn't the excuse for the divorce. The was a buddys sister saying that to her husband, when she came home from work early. Only to find her husband in bed with another man! :eek:

[Ja Rhule]

My dick don't want to be around you anymore.

[Panthers128]

"I have aids."

[88 Bronco]

"I'm in love with bronco's mom."

Not even my dad loves her

Back on topic, "I have an obsession with Hayden Panettiere."

[Doyle]

I don't like being smacked around.

My mom to my dad.

[TarPanther9180]

Did you think the sammiches were going to make themselves?

[Cat]

You cheated on me 15 years ago. You got busted back then, we got past it, but now I want a divorce.

My mom to my dad...

how old were you when she told him that?

[jasonluckydog]

How could you fug my mother! I want a divorce.

[Davidson Deac II]

How could you fug my mother! I want a divorce.

Ok, thats actually a pretty good excuse, not a lame one at all. :)

[cookinwithgas]

My friend called me one night crying that his wife told him she "needed some space". This was a few years after he forgave her for cheating.

Called me the next night to tell me he got her cell phone bill in the mail - shes been talking with a guy she met at the beach for months (she tried to con him into thinking their daughter was calling a friend) and her "work trips" were to see him - he had no problem giving the bitch space after that.