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It's My Birthday!

Montsta

By Montsta,
in Carolina Panthers

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Montsta Rising Star

Montsta

Posted
Posted

Well boys, it's your ol uncle Montsta's birthday today. 31 years ago today my mother shat me out of her womb not knowing that she would be birthing a menace to society that would grow up to be a multiple convicted felon. Certainly in my 31 years I've had my fair share of down times, mostly brought on by my seemingly inherent inability to make the right decision when provided an opportunity to do so. Yes sir, it seems like every time I'm faced with right or wrong, logical or irrational, I decide to travel down whichever path is going to come bite me in the ass later on down the road.

So here I sit. I'm in my hotel room in Orlando, my wife is in the shower getting ready for the game tonight, and she will no doubt be out shortly and ask how many beers I've had when she glances down and see's this IPA in my hand. I lost count sweetheart, but it's my birthday and I don't give a damn. Are you on that Panthers website again? Yes I am, and I would appreciate it if you would stop trying to interfere with me getting pumped up for game day.

I've been on here all day long reading about people being nervous for the game today. Like somehow past transgressions of Panthers teams long since forgotten will somehow effect the way this group of Panthers plays on this day. I implore you gentleman (and lady panther and coug something) to get pumped. This team has thoroughly dismantled the teams we should, and we will again tonight. I can feel it. No more nervousness or trepidation. I am going to walk into Raymond James in a couple of short hours, already decently inebriated, and I am going to cheer on our boys until I have no voice left.

Are these the incoherent ramblings of a drunk man? You bet your sweet ass they are. I promise you all this, I will be far and away the loudest person inside Raymond James tonight, and much to the dismay of my wife, I will not relent. I will not stop. I will not take it easy.

I hear the team is asking its fans to dress as pirates tonight. Well ahoy mateys!! It will be a quiet night from the cannons as your team takes a dismantling at the hands of my Carolina Panthers. I've never fought a pirate before, but if Jack Sparrow thinks he's a bigger fan than I, he'll find himself at the bottom of Davy Jones' locker for sure.

This isn't the same team from years past. We have a certain unflappable confidence that will only build with each takeaway, each Kuechly tackle, and each display of our fearless leader ripping away his mortal costume to reveal the "S" on his chest.

Stay glued to your TV's my friends, and look for your pal Montsta behind the Panthers bench. And if you are at the game in person, I better hear you, and hear you well. Happy birthday me, it's going to be a good one.

Panthers 38

CDC Lab Rats 10

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ItsNotGonnaBeAlright Newbie

ItsNotGonnaBeAlright

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Posted

My birthday wish to you: late in the fourth qaurter,with the Bucs down by 21 points, Schiano says something typically stupid that finally sends one of his players over the edge, causing said player to beat him to death on the sideline just as the Panthers get into the endzone one last time. When he draws his last breath will be the only time the stadium cheers tonight.

Happy birthday.

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