Quick poll

[cookinwithgas]

Tonight I pick up my kids from their activity. Turn the car on, the radio is on low. 12 year old gets out his phone, plugs in headphones, and starts singing. I ask him to please stop because the radio is on and I am listening to it and it's really unlistenable.

 

Am I rude/mean for asking him not to sing out loud to his music with headphones on while I have the car radio on?

 

Is he rude for singing with headphones on?

 

What say ye?

[Ja Rhule]

He's rude. U r his dad and he should listen and respect you.

[Mother Grabber]

he's frickin 12 years old. let him be a kid while he still can.  He'll grow up and be boring soon enough.

[cookinwithgas]

I like to hear him sing. I just like to hear the song hes listening to instead of something else while he does it.

[cookinbrak]

Let him sing.

Record him singing on your phone.

Show it to his friends.

[MCC]

Play music through the speakers that he'll enjoy and sing along with.

[SmokinwithWilly]

Record him singing. Put it on a cd or MP3 player if your car has an adapter. Let him sing along to him singing along. He probably doesn't realize he's doing it.

Honestly, I think it's a little rude for him not to discuss what he's doing with you first. It mutual respect and its a simple lesson to teach now that he will need later. As long as you talk to him about it, all should be cool.

[Goondal]

As far as I am concerned whoever is in the driver's seat controls the radio. If a passenger wants to listen to something else with earbuds then that is fine but no singing unless it is to your stuff.

The driver of the car should be in their comfort zone.

This really goes regardless of the relationship between the driver and the passenger.

[Goondal]

Also, I do not think either of you were rude. Now if he refused and continued what he was doing then he is the rude one

[Pejorative Miscreant]

I write this as I sit about 8000 miles away from my kids so take it wit a grain of salt. Don't take a child's singing for granted. That said I don't think you are rude nor is he. H has his headphones and just needs to realize he impacts you. Pretty cool dad for asking IMO.

[Mol3m4n]

I always let my passenger control the music, unless they just have zero taste in music and I'm stuck listening to Lady Gaga or something.

[Inimicus]

I'm probably a jerk but I disallowed earbuds/headphones/video games in the car.

 

Along with dinner it was one of the few times we could really get our 11+ year old to engage in conversations.  The fact that she didn't have to look me in the eye when we talked seemed to drop her guard. I learned all kinds of things about her and her friends that I'm guessing she would have been otherwise too embarrassed to share.

 

The initial disappointment she might have had over it was ultimately replaced by a genuine engagement.

 

 

And when all 3 of us were in the car we had a deal that my wife and I wouldn't talk about things that excluded her.

[Johnny Rockets]

I have often have a similar "battle" with my 10 year old daughter a lot in the car and at home. She cannot stand to use headphones for whatever reason and she uses her kindle / iphone, etc. in the car and will play games or watch videos while I am listening to the radio.

 

She also plays Minecraft at home on her laptop while Skyping with her friends in the living room while I watch TV. I usually just ask her to turn it down or to talk lower and we find a happy medium.  Sometimes if what I am listening to / watching isn't that important, I'll just turn mine off so she can enjoy what she is doing without me constantly hounding her to change the volume. Either way it's never been a real issue. 

 

Ultimately your are the Dad - so what you say goes. 

[Hawk]

Johnny...we all know that's not your kid....send her back to me you SOB!

 

as for OP....the kid is 12....enjoy the hell out of now while you can...in a couple years you won't get a word out of him