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Draft O-Line: An ode to belly's and man tits

SCP

By SCP,
in Carolina Panthers

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SCP Enthusiast

SCP

Posted
Posted

A joyous day

Nipple Shorts has us guessing

Which way do we go

What position do we pick

Some say draft a playmaker

He runs the 40 lightning quick

Speed and hands that make grown men fap

Fug that poo it could be a trap

Speed, hands, and quicks don't mean poo

Without a 360 pound athletic tub of goo

It all starts up front with the fatties

The guys that keep their shirts on in the pool

TDs, rushing yards, passing records you fool!

All wishful thinking if there are no blocks

No running lanes or time for Cam to throw rocks

You gonna trust Bell on that blind side?

I don't care if Jerry Rice is out wide

Ring the bell Cam will say

I can't avoid 8 defenders in my face

All these Steeler fans in BofA fug this place

I want a guy who believes BoJang's is healthy

Somebody to prtotect Cam so he can get wealthy

We need some real men that can dominate poo

Not some project who was mediocre in D2

So gather round and circle jerk to the next great set of wheels

But with our oline none of that poo will matter

At least that's my feels

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TNPanther Rising Star

TNPanther

Posted
Posted

Took a dump in Lowe's last weekend. Gorgeous bathroom and I thought of you the whole time I was punishing the porcelain.

Lowe's does have gorgeous bathrooms. But I prefer taking a poo in Home Depot because that way I know that in some way my poo is associated with Arthur Blank

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    • strato
      Flux

      By strato · Posted

      You don’t even need 1b because Tepper is the only one foolish enough to wheel that deal.    Player wise? Jake’s elbow. JR and Pep getting sideways, no Carruth, Cam’s shoulder, Luke’s concussions, it would be a long list of stuff. You can take it down to certain plays in games. Fox chasing 2 point conversions in the SB would be on my list. RMJr slipping at the end of that same game was not helpful. 
    • frankw
      Top 10 worst qb rooms from CBS sports. Panthers number 9

      By frankw · Posted

      Ultimately this just amounts to heavy revisionist history. I mean you aren't talking to someone that just popped out the womb a week ago. I was here all throughout the predraft process. The overwhelming majority of the fanbase felt like this was a fine situation and the best situation for a rookie QB to go to compared to Houston for example. The hype for Young and our "rockstar" staff was off the charts. No one could dare speak cautious skepticism of his abilities or they would be neg repped into oblivion. Only after he had one of statistical worst rookie seasons of the last 25 years did we get this narrative now that his rookie season actually shouldn't count. Complete malarkey if you ask me.
    • LinvilleGorge
      Flux

      By LinvilleGorge · Posted

      On the field? Since I guess it qualifies as multiple instances it might not count, but have the damn refs throw some flags on illegal hits to Cam's head in SB50. If that doesn't count, 1A. Cotchery caught it 1B. Kasey keeps that kickoff inbounds. Off the field? 1A. Team is sold to anyone but Tepper 1B. We have the patience not to mortgage the franchise on that Bryce trade. Stroudwpuldve been the better pick but he's not worth it either.
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