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I am so F**king tired of hearing about how we are going to lose this Houston game

SCP

By SCP,
in Carolina Panthers

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SCP

Posted
Posted

To hell with a damn smack thread this week, we need some fire and some piss and vinegar.  Come Sunday the grills will be hot, the beer will be cold and come hell or high water I will be raising immortal hell in BofA stadium.  We won in Jax but you would think we were blown out.  Now that other team from Texas is coming to town and our fan base has turned into a milquetoast mix of florescent green Croc wearing pansy asses.  Christ it sounds like every parking lot is going to be filled with a bunch of Honda Odyssey driving, khaki wearing , turkey burger eating dudes in sweater vests that dump 15% of their paychecks into a savings account every pay period.  "Hey excuse me buddy but please don't say the F word around my wife."  Well f*ck that sh*t!!!!  

Sons of the Huddle! I am SCP.  You may have heard that JJ Watt is seventy feet tall!  Yes, I've heard as well. Kills QBs by the hundreds. And when JJ is here, he will consume Remmers and Oher with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.  Bros!  I see a whole army of my Panther fan brethren, here in defiance of the haters! You have come to cheer your arses off as proud men and proud women. And proud men and women we are! We have a team that will fight!  What will you do without a dominant left or right tackle? Will you stand and cheer? Will you sit down when security says to be quiet?  Will you sip your crappy wine and nipple (yes I meant nipple because DG is a boss, respect) on your sh*tty cheese like a scared little mouse?  Will you let some clown in a Steeler jersey talk down about OUR team in OUR town?  Will you yell until your lungs explode every damn time a sorry ass Texans QB steps under center? Will you fight?  I keep hearing on the radio "JJ Watt against eleven? No way man! We will get curb stomped!  We should throw in the towel and will still win the NFC South!"  Yes! Stand and cheer and fight and you may have a good time on Sunday. Run scared and you might three-peat as NFC South champs and be able to talk smack, at least awhile. And dying in your bed many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance, to come back to BofA with your children and grandchildren and tell them that JJ Watt did not conquer the day.  Will you look them in their eye and tell them you did everything in your power from the seats to make the Texans lives miserable.  This demigod that Houston fans bow down to everyday, you tell your children that he did not ruin our beer buzz. That he may have taken Michael Ohers life but he will never take our fandom!  

My name is Southimus Cackimus Pantherus, commander of the parking lot, General of section 529, and loyal servant to the TRUE boss, David Nippleshorts Gettleman. Saint fans call me daddy, Husband to a wife with nice tits that I motorboat on the reg. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.  Man up Panther fans.

Panthers 24
Houston 10

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